Also true of Chinese restaurants! Often the cheapest and tattiest looking ones are the best.

You got there before me, always see how clean the toilets are, its a sure sign how clean the kitchen will be.

Chinese restaurants--the Chinese eating there, the more authentic the cooking.

Dirty greasy sticky menus! I don't care how big it is or if its laminated, keep it clean, puts me off straight away, followed by dirty cutlery and dirty toilets, have walked out of many a place because of this.

Yeah, very true. Alternatively, me & Pops were on holiday in Biarritz a few years ago and thought we'd try this little Italian place we spotted. When we got there, we were a little unnerved to be the only people in there (a middle-aged couple were just leaving as we went in) and thought, "oo-er, this isn't a good sign." We needn't have worried though. By the time we hit the puddings there was literally not a spare seat anywhere in the place.

Fantastic place; superb food and atmosphere, and discovered completely at random.

Don't be put off by restaurants being empty in France or Italy early in the evening. Few go out to dine before 8 p.m., then everyone arrives at the same time!

We found a small Italian in Edinburgh, which had only just opened for the day and so no one was inside. Have to say though was a great meal and cooked just the way we asked - Mushroom Risotto with no cream, but lots of mushrooms for the OH and Seafood Risotto, no onions for me.

We keep meaning to go back, but never seem to have the chance. I think the thing that convinced us, was that it was a family run place. With their kids (about 10yo) helping to set up for the night, before they headed off.

When they have their own car park which is virtually empty at 8pm on a Friday or Saturday night.

If there is a hand written recruitment ad in the window saying Chef Required!


Bluey

when the waiter can't understand more than a few basic phrases of the language that the whole country speaks!

I wouldn't say that's a sign of a bad restaurant, could be the opposite.

The easy way to spot a bad restaurant, it's empty.

If the curtains look like they belong in your nan's house.

If you go in one morning and you see the chef masturbating in the gravy. Never trust a restaurant that prepares the gravy too early.

I ate at a fantastic restaurant in Lanzarote that was empty. Think the reason was it didn't serve British food.

-When everyone dining in the restaurant is clearly a member of the owners family

-Putting an insect repellant lamp on the table

Blimey, if he is doing that what has he done in the chocolate mousse?

I never meant that a restaurant had to be full before it would be considered 'good', just that if it was empty it is not used by anyone. they can't even be dragged in.

I've no idea if a full restaurant is good or not (here, I give you McDonalds as a full restaurant that I wouldn't set foot in) but I'm quite happy with my theory on empty restaurants.