Thank you all so much for sharing your experiences!
Our cat Poppy, was mainly and indoor cat, she especially loved the sun and hated the rain and would stay in. She didn't venture far, only on top of the shed, in the field opposite, (at the front of the house)which is seperated from us by a quiet small lane. We have lots of foliage out the back and this is where she is buried now, in her favourite place, where she spent alot of time catching spiders and moths!
We never shut her out in the day. If we were here, she'd stay around us, if we weren't then food water and a tray was ready for her indoors! (which she never used after her first taste of the foliage!)
I think there were two issues...1) she was being bullied by another female cat from two doors down, which she used to run like hell from! This cat used to come into our garden and terrorize her, until big bad me went out and shoo'ed the bully off! 2) She began to be a hunter and brought mice home from the field opposite, as presents for us! She seemed to be very proud of these skills and I had to take her to the vets more regularly to have flea and worm treatment.
With these two things when she went way down the lane and entered the main road, she was either being chased by bully cat or she had depleted the field of mice and decided to venture to other places to look for them?
In any way, we've lost her and we're at a bit of a crossroads here now. We are definately going to take any kittens out on harnesses when they're neutered and had the injections and make sure the road is a no no....don't know if this will work, it's worth a try, we think.
The other thing I think is that all cats have very different personalities like humans.
My mam's cat lived to 19 and was an out cat.
My cat I had when I was 20 (am 40 now) was climbing the walls to be an out cat, so I gave her to my close work colleague who had her as an out cat near a busy road for 18 years.
So I think the solution is to give half and half like we did with Poppy, although we may change our minds!
Thanks 3SM