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Old 13-04-2007, 21:44
Muttley76
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nearly 2200 pages as well.....

eta: there you go....
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Old 13-04-2007, 21:44
RGWT
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Yup I've got it....give me a sec
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Old 13-04-2007, 21:44
Red-Eye
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Originally Posted by diva queen
No worries RG
Fruits has asked me to post her script *starts giggling*
Father Ted= Jermaine Jackson
Father Dougal= Ian Watkins
Father Jack= Dirk Benedict
Father Stone= Jack Tweed
Mrs Doyle = Shilpa Shetty
Bishop Brennan/BB/Len= Ken Russel
Jade = herself

Whiskeygate 2

Day 12 in the Parochial House

All of the housemates, are in the living room. Except Mrs Doyle who is in the kitchen, and
Father Stone and Jade who are in the bathroom.

Father Stone and Jade return from the bathroom looking flustered, and take a seat on the sofa

Mrs Doyle comes in from the kitchen with a tray of dandelion tea

Mrs Doyle: "Cup of tea, fathers?"

Mrs Doyle: Father Jack, what would you say to a nice cup?

Father Jack: Feeck off, cup!

Mrs Doyle: Father Stone, will you have a cup of tea?

Father Stone: No, I'm fine

Mrs Doyle: Ah will you not have a cup of dandelion tea?

Father Stone: No, I'm fine

Mrs Doyle: Ah come on now, you will

Father Stone: No, I'm fine

Mrs Doyle: Not just a little cup? Ah Go on....Go on...!! Go on go on go on, go on go on go on go on go on go on go go, go on go on GO ON!!

Jade: That tea looks green or sa'ink, Father stone, i'll get you some of Father Jack's whiskey

Jade: Father Jack, can Father Stone have half your whiskey?

Father Jack: Feeck Off!

Jade: Are you jokin? That's really selfish! I'll just take it then

Jade makes a move towards the whiskey, and in a burst of rage Father Jack throws Jade out of the living room window.

Voice over tannoy:

"This is Bishop Brennan, would one housemate come to the confession room, imediately!"

Father Dougal comes to the confession room

Dougal: Hello there Len.
Bishop Brennan: Don't call me Len, you pr*ck. Refer to me as 'Bishop Brennan'!
Dougal: Ah right you are there Len
BB: Father Jack's behaviour is totally unacceptable, you must ask him to appologise now!

Father Dougal, slighly intimidated by Father Jack, asks Father Ted to tell him BB's order. Ted, always one to keep the peace in the house, takes it upon
himself to speak to Father Jack, who is now back in his chair with his whiskey.

Ted: Jack, you have been very rude, now appologise to Jade

Father Jack gets down on his knees

Father Jack: I'm soooo sooooo sooooo sorry!

Ted: Now THATS sarcasm!

THE END
ROFLMAO !

Brilliant Fruits ! I knew you would do the "Father Ted" one in the end !






On Topic I Love MBH Dirk !
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Old 13-04-2007, 21:45
RGWT
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This is divas



Doctor Who The Chance of Luck Christmas special
6 months of defeating Mr Saxon/The Master, The Doctor and Martha return to Earth to have Christmas Dinner at Martha's mum's house. When they arrive they r told that Martha's brother has been kidnapped by Mr Gollum(Dirk Benedict) an alien The Doctor has not encountered before. They soon find him.

The Doctor: So you're Mr Gollum not thee one from Lord of the rings
Mr Gollum: What No!! and you must b the famous Doctor i've heard a lot about.
The Doctor: You have to stop this now or people will die.
Mr Gollum: I'm afraid thats too late Time Lord.
Martha: How did you know he's a time lord.
Mr Gollum: Because my people the Catopulses with killed by Time Lords in the time war. How many r left then Doctor. MG looking at the Doctor
The Doctor: I'm the lone survivor. But what r u gonna accomplish by destroying Earth hmm Destruction in your path.
TD soons realises what Gollum plan is.
The Doctor: U're trying to drain the earth of power and air so u can fly your ship to your planet. I can't believe you r so thick.
Mr Gollum: How dare u call me thick i'm smarter than u.
The Doctor: Ahh but you don't know what i'm capable of.
Mr Gollum: What
The Doctor pushes MG into the burning gas cylinder and it explodes
Martha: That showed him right
Leo: R u ok Doctor
The Doctor: Yep i'm good
Martha, TD & Leo go back and have christmas lunch at Martha's mum's house.
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Old 13-04-2007, 21:45
Muttley76
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Originally Posted by rainbow321
Ten green dirklings sitting on a wall
Ten green dirklings sitting on a wall
and if one green dirkling should accidently fall
there'd be nine green dirklings sitting on a wall

Nine green dirklings sitting on a wall
Nine green dirklings sitting on a wall...........................
and if one green dirkling should accidently fall
there'd be eight green dirklings sitting on a wall.....
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Old 13-04-2007, 21:45
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Originally Posted by diva queen
No worries RG
Fruits has asked me to post her script *starts giggling*
Father Ted= Jermaine Jackson
Father Dougal= Ian Watkins
Father Jack= Dirk Benedict
Father Stone= Jack Tweed
Mrs Doyle = Shilpa Shetty
Bishop Brennan/BB/Len= Ken Russel
Jade = herself

Whiskeygate 2

Day 12 in the Parochial House

All of the housemates, are in the living room. Except Mrs Doyle who is in the kitchen, and
Father Stone and Jade who are in the bathroom.

Father Stone and Jade return from the bathroom looking flustered, and take a seat on the sofa

Mrs Doyle comes in from the kitchen with a tray of dandelion tea

Mrs Doyle: "Cup of tea, fathers?"

Mrs Doyle: Father Jack, what would you say to a nice cup?

Father Jack: Feeck off, cup!

Mrs Doyle: Father Stone, will you have a cup of tea?

Father Stone: No, I'm fine

Mrs Doyle: Ah will you not have a cup of dandelion tea?

Father Stone: No, I'm fine

Mrs Doyle: Ah come on now, you will

Father Stone: No, I'm fine

Mrs Doyle: Not just a little cup? Ah Go on....Go on...!! Go on go on go on, go on go on go on go on go on go on go go, go on go on GO ON!!

Jade: That tea looks green or sa'ink, Father stone, i'll get you some of Father Jack's whiskey

Jade: Father Jack, can Father Stone have half your whiskey?

Father Jack: Feeck Off!

Jade: Are you jokin? That's really selfish! I'll just take it then

Jade makes a move towards the whiskey, and in a burst of rage Father Jack throws Jade out of the living room window.

Voice over tannoy:

"This is Bishop Brennan, would one housemate come to the confession room, imediately!"

Father Dougal comes to the confession room

Dougal: Hello there Len.
Bishop Brennan: Don't call me Len, you pr*ck. Refer to me as 'Bishop Brennan'!
Dougal: Ah right you are there Len
BB: Father Jack's behaviour is totally unacceptable, you must ask him to appologise now!

Father Dougal, slighly intimidated by Father Jack, asks Father Ted to tell him BB's order. Ted, always one to keep the peace in the house, takes it upon
himself to speak to Father Jack, who is now back in his chair with his whiskey.

Ted: Jack, you have been very rude, now appologise to Jade

Father Jack gets down on his knees

Father Jack: I'm soooo sooooo sooooo sorry!

Ted: Now THATS sarcasm!

THE END
PMSL.....LOL
thats excellent

Dirk would make a great Father Jack....he'd have fun doing that role
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Old 13-04-2007, 21:46
Red-Eye
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Originally Posted by SneakyBoo
Really Red eye i thought that that tiamat was another form of Cleo in a Tiara type big ugly dragon style invention.........just goes to show what a muppet head i am

a multi-headed cleo/tiara monster.....now thats scary


SNEAKYBOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Your gonna give me nightmares now!







On Topic I Love MBH Dirk !

Last edited by Red-Eye : 13-04-2007 at 21:50.
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Old 13-04-2007, 21:46
diva queen
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Fruits will give Ricky Gervais & Stephen Merchant a run for their money with her excellent script which is funnier than they could write





On Topic I love MBF Dirk
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Old 13-04-2007, 21:47
rainbow321
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Originally Posted by diva queen
No worries RG
Fruits has asked me to post her script *starts giggling*
Father Ted= Jermaine Jackson
Father Dougal= Ian Watkins
Father Jack= Dirk Benedict
Father Stone= Jack Tweed
Mrs Doyle = Shilpa Shetty
Bishop Brennan/BB/Len= Ken Russel
Jade = herself

Whiskeygate 2

Day 12 in the Parochial House

All of the housemates, are in the living room. Except Mrs Doyle who is in the kitchen, and
Father Stone and Jade who are in the bathroom.

Father Stone and Jade return from the bathroom looking flustered, and take a seat on the sofa

Mrs Doyle comes in from the kitchen with a tray of dandelion tea

Mrs Doyle: "Cup of tea, fathers?"

Mrs Doyle: Father Jack, what would you say to a nice cup?

Father Jack: Feeck off, cup!

Mrs Doyle: Father Stone, will you have a cup of tea?

Father Stone: No, I'm fine

Mrs Doyle: Ah will you not have a cup of dandelion tea?

Father Stone: No, I'm fine

Mrs Doyle: Ah come on now, you will

Father Stone: No, I'm fine

Mrs Doyle: Not just a little cup? Ah Go on....Go on...!! Go on go on go on, go on go on go on go on go on go on go go, go on go on GO ON!!

Jade: That tea looks green or sa'ink, Father stone, i'll get you some of Father Jack's whiskey

Jade: Father Jack, can Father Stone have half your whiskey?

Father Jack: Feeck Off!

Jade: Are you jokin? That's really selfish! I'll just take it then

Jade makes a move towards the whiskey, and in a burst of rage Father Jack throws Jade out of the living room window.

Voice over tannoy:

"This is Bishop Brennan, would one housemate come to the confession room, imediately!"

Father Dougal comes to the confession room

Dougal: Hello there Len.
Bishop Brennan: Don't call me Len, you pr*ck. Refer to me as 'Bishop Brennan'!
Dougal: Ah right you are there Len
BB: Father Jack's behaviour is totally unacceptable, you must ask him to appologise now!

Father Dougal, slighly intimidated by Father Jack, asks Father Ted to tell him BB's order. Ted, always one to keep the peace in the house, takes it upon
himself to speak to Father Jack, who is now back in his chair with his whiskey.

Ted: Jack, you have been very rude, now appologise to Jade

Father Jack gets down on his knees

Father Jack: I'm soooo sooooo sooooo sorry!

Ted: Now THATS sarcasm!

THE END
You are all so clever - that is another brilliant script - i don't know where you get your ideas from!!
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Old 13-04-2007, 21:47
gmr73
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Originally Posted by RGWT
This is divas



Doctor Who The Chance of Luck Christmas special
6 months of defeating Mr Saxon/The Master, The Doctor and Martha return to Earth to have Christmas Dinner at Martha's mum's house. When they arrive they r told that Martha's brother has been kidnapped by Mr Gollum(Dirk Benedict) an alien The Doctor has not encountered before. They soon find him.

The Doctor: So you're Mr Gollum not thee one from Lord of the rings
Mr Gollum: What No!! and you must b the famous Doctor i've heard a lot about.
The Doctor: You have to stop this now or people will die.
Mr Gollum: I'm afraid thats too late Time Lord.
Martha: How did you know he's a time lord.
Mr Gollum: Because my people the Catopulses with killed by Time Lords in the time war. How many r left then Doctor. MG looking at the Doctor
The Doctor: I'm the lone survivor. But what r u gonna accomplish by destroying Earth hmm Destruction in your path.
TD soons realises what Gollum plan is.
The Doctor: U're trying to drain the earth of power and air so u can fly your ship to your planet. I can't believe you r so thick.
Mr Gollum: How dare u call me thick i'm smarter than u.
The Doctor: Ahh but you don't know what i'm capable of.
Mr Gollum: What
The Doctor pushes MG into the burning gas cylinder and it explodes
Martha: That showed him right
Leo: R u ok Doctor
The Doctor: Yep i'm good
Martha, TD & Leo go back and have christmas lunch at Martha's mum's house.
When did Leo sneak in?
Very good Diva.
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Old 13-04-2007, 21:47
Muttley76
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Originally Posted by RGWT
This is divas



Doctor Who The Chance of Luck Christmas special
6 months of defeating Mr Saxon/The Master, The Doctor and Martha return to Earth to have Christmas Dinner at Martha's mum's house. When they arrive they r told that Martha's brother has been kidnapped by Mr Gollum(Dirk Benedict) an alien The Doctor has not encountered before. They soon find him.

The Doctor: So you're Mr Gollum not thee one from Lord of the rings
Mr Gollum: What No!! and you must b the famous Doctor i've heard a lot about.
The Doctor: You have to stop this now or people will die.
Mr Gollum: I'm afraid thats too late Time Lord.
Martha: How did you know he's a time lord.
Mr Gollum: Because my people the Catopulses with killed by Time Lords in the time war. How many r left then Doctor. MG looking at the Doctor
The Doctor: I'm the lone survivor. But what r u gonna accomplish by destroying Earth hmm Destruction in your path.
TD soons realises what Gollum plan is.
The Doctor: U're trying to drain the earth of power and air so u can fly your ship to your planet. I can't believe you r so thick.Mr Gollum: How dare u call me thick i'm smarter than u.
The Doctor: Ahh but you don't know what i'm capable of.
Mr Gollum: What
The Doctor pushes MG into the burning gas cylinder and it explodes
Martha: That showed him right
Leo: R u ok Doctor
The Doctor: Yep i'm good
Martha, TD & Leo go back and have christmas lunch at Martha's mum's house.


very good!
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Old 13-04-2007, 21:47
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fruits - thats a work of genius brilliant characterisation and very funny
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Old 13-04-2007, 21:49
Red-Eye
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Originally Posted by RGWT
This is divas



Doctor Who The Chance of Luck Christmas special
6 months of defeating Mr Saxon/The Master, The Doctor and Martha return to Earth to have Christmas Dinner at Martha's mum's house. When they arrive they r told that Martha's brother has been kidnapped by Mr Gollum(Dirk Benedict) an alien The Doctor has not encountered before. They soon find him.

The Doctor: So you're Mr Gollum not thee one from Lord of the rings
Mr Gollum: What No!! and you must b the famous Doctor i've heard a lot about.
The Doctor: You have to stop this now or people will die.
Mr Gollum: I'm afraid thats too late Time Lord.
Martha: How did you know he's a time lord.
Mr Gollum: Because my people the Catopulses with killed by Time Lords in the time war. How many r left then Doctor. MG looking at the Doctor
The Doctor: I'm the lone survivor. But what r u gonna accomplish by destroying Earth hmm Destruction in your path.
TD soons realises what Gollum plan is.
The Doctor: U're trying to drain the earth of power and air so u can fly your ship to your planet. I can't believe you r so thick.
Mr Gollum: How dare u call me thick i'm smarter than u.
The Doctor: Ahh but you don't know what i'm capable of.
Mr Gollum: What
The Doctor pushes MG into the burning gas cylinder and it explodes
Martha: That showed him right
Leo: R u ok Doctor
The Doctor: Yep i'm good
Martha, TD & Leo go back and have christmas lunch at Martha's mum's house.
WOW! Great scrpit Diva! I loved it !

Hmmmmmmmmm? Maybe yours will finally persuade RTD to hire Dirk .






On Topic I Love MBH Dirk !
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Old 13-04-2007, 21:50
SneakyBoo
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Originally Posted by RGWT
This is divas



Doctor Who The Chance of Luck Christmas special
6 months of defeating Mr Saxon/The Master, The Doctor and Martha return to Earth to have Christmas Dinner at Martha's mum's house. When they arrive they r told that Martha's brother has been kidnapped by Mr Gollum(Dirk Benedict) an alien The Doctor has not encountered before. They soon find him.

The Doctor: So you're Mr Gollum not thee one from Lord of the rings
Mr Gollum: What No!! and you must b the famous Doctor i've heard a lot about.
The Doctor: You have to stop this now or people will die.
Mr Gollum: I'm afraid thats too late Time Lord.
Martha: How did you know he's a time lord.
Mr Gollum: Because my people the Catopulses with killed by Time Lords in the time war. How many r left then Doctor. MG looking at the Doctor
The Doctor: I'm the lone survivor. But what r u gonna accomplish by destroying Earth hmm Destruction in your path.
TD soons realises what Gollum plan is.
The Doctor: U're trying to drain the earth of power and air so u can fly your ship to your planet. I can't believe you r so thick.
Mr Gollum: How dare u call me thick i'm smarter than u.
The Doctor: Ahh but you don't know what i'm capable of.
Mr Gollum: What
The Doctor pushes MG into the burning gas cylinder and it explodes
Martha: That showed him right
Leo: R u ok Doctor
The Doctor: Yep i'm good
Martha, TD & Leo go back and have christmas lunch at Martha's mum's house.
I see ur following the theme of Dirks movies by killing him off in the end
From mongoose to gas cylinder

Still excellent
well done
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Old 13-04-2007, 21:53
Muttley76
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Originally Posted by SneakyBoo
I see ur following the theme of Dirks movies by killing him off in the end
From mongoose to gas cylinder
lol....good point! Poor Dirk
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Old 13-04-2007, 21:53
Cicero22
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Originally Posted by RGWT
This is divas



Doctor Who The Chance of Luck Christmas special
6 months of defeating Mr Saxon/The Master, The Doctor and Martha return to Earth to have Christmas Dinner at Martha's mum's house. When they arrive they r told that Martha's brother has been kidnapped by Mr Gollum(Dirk Benedict) an alien The Doctor has not encountered before. They soon find him.

The Doctor: So you're Mr Gollum not thee one from Lord of the rings
Mr Gollum: What No!! and you must b the famous Doctor i've heard a lot about.
The Doctor: You have to stop this now or people will die.
Mr Gollum: I'm afraid thats too late Time Lord.
Martha: How did you know he's a time lord.
Mr Gollum: Because my people the Catopulses with killed by Time Lords in the time war. How many r left then Doctor. MG looking at the Doctor
The Doctor: I'm the lone survivor. But what r u gonna accomplish by destroying Earth hmm Destruction in your path.
TD soons realises what Gollum plan is.
The Doctor: U're trying to drain the earth of power and air so u can fly your ship to your planet. I can't believe you r so thick.
Mr Gollum: How dare u call me thick i'm smarter than u.
The Doctor: Ahh but you don't know what i'm capable of.
Mr Gollum: What
The Doctor pushes MG into the burning gas cylinder and it explodes
Martha: That showed him right
Leo: R u ok Doctor
The Doctor: Yep i'm good
Martha, TD & Leo go back and have christmas lunch at Martha's mum's house.
Well done diva - just a normal lunch at Martha's mum's house obviously just the odd explosion to contend with
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Old 13-04-2007, 21:53
SneakyBoo
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Originally Posted by Red-Eye


SNEAKYBOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Your gonna give me nightmares now!







On Topic I Love MBH Dirk !
Sorry there Red EYe ....i won't do it again
May i suggest arming your Dirk just in case its true...i hear he's an excellent shot...so u should be safe
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Old 13-04-2007, 21:54
Cicero22
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*thinks may have to start watching Dr. Who if to keep up with conversation over the next few weeks*
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Old 13-04-2007, 21:54
Susann
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That was great, Diva Not sure about the ending though
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Old 13-04-2007, 21:55
Red-Eye
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Originally Posted by SneakyBoo
Sorry there Red EYe ....i won't do it again
May i suggest arming your Dirk just in case its true...i hear he's an excellent shot...so u should be safe
Oh don't worry! MBH Dirky is always prepared for such things !








On Topic I Love MBH Dirk !
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Old 13-04-2007, 21:55
Almira G
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Originally Posted by diva queen
No worries RG
Fruits has asked me to post her script *starts giggling*
Father Ted= Jermaine Jackson
Father Dougal= Ian Watkins
Father Jack= Dirk Benedict
Father Stone= Jack Tweed
Mrs Doyle = Shilpa Shetty
Bishop Brennan/BB/Len= Ken Russel
Jade = herself

Whiskeygate 2

Day 12 in the Parochial House

All of the housemates, are in the living room. Except Mrs Doyle who is in the kitchen, and
Father Stone and Jade who are in the bathroom.

Father Stone and Jade return from the bathroom looking flustered, and take a seat on the sofa

Mrs Doyle comes in from the kitchen with a tray of dandelion tea

Mrs Doyle: "Cup of tea, fathers?"

Mrs Doyle: Father Jack, what would you say to a nice cup?

Father Jack: Feeck off, cup!

Mrs Doyle: Father Stone, will you have a cup of tea?

Father Stone: No, I'm fine

Mrs Doyle: Ah will you not have a cup of dandelion tea?

Father Stone: No, I'm fine

Mrs Doyle: Ah come on now, you will

Father Stone: No, I'm fine

Mrs Doyle: Not just a little cup? Ah Go on....Go on...!! Go on go on go on, go on go on go on go on go on go on go go, go on go on GO ON!!

Jade: That tea looks green or sa'ink, Father stone, i'll get you some of Father Jack's whiskey

Jade: Father Jack, can Father Stone have half your whiskey?

Father Jack: Feeck Off!

Jade: Are you jokin? That's really selfish! I'll just take it then

Jade makes a move towards the whiskey, and in a burst of rage Father Jack throws Jade out of the living room window.

Voice over tannoy:

"This is Bishop Brennan, would one housemate come to the confession room, imediately!"

Father Dougal comes to the confession room

Dougal: Hello there Len.
Bishop Brennan: Don't call me Len, you pr*ck. Refer to me as 'Bishop Brennan'!
Dougal: Ah right you are there Len
BB: Father Jack's behaviour is totally unacceptable, you must ask him to appologise now!

Father Dougal, slighly intimidated by Father Jack, asks Father Ted to tell him BB's order. Ted, always one to keep the peace in the house, takes it upon
himself to speak to Father Jack, who is now back in his chair with his whiskey.

Ted: Jack, you have been very rude, now appologise to Jade

Father Jack gets down on his knees

Father Jack: I'm soooo sooooo sooooo sorry!

Ted: Now THATS sarcasm!

THE END
Absolutely BRILLIANT, Fruits!!!!!!! - Somehow, I KNEW it would be!!!!!!!
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Old 13-04-2007, 21:57
SneakyBoo
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Nearly 55000 posts you guys.....look
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Old 13-04-2007, 21:57
diva queen
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Thanks for posting it RG
Almira's script is next, then Muttley's, RG's, SneakyBoo if you've done one and Susann's




On Topic I love MBF Dirk
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Old 13-04-2007, 21:57
Almira G
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Originally Posted by RGWT
This is divas



Doctor Who The Chance of Luck Christmas special
6 months of defeating Mr Saxon/The Master, The Doctor and Martha return to Earth to have Christmas Dinner at Martha's mum's house. When they arrive they r told that Martha's brother has been kidnapped by Mr Gollum(Dirk Benedict) an alien The Doctor has not encountered before. They soon find him.

The Doctor: So you're Mr Gollum not thee one from Lord of the rings
Mr Gollum: What No!! and you must b the famous Doctor i've heard a lot about.
The Doctor: You have to stop this now or people will die.
Mr Gollum: I'm afraid thats too late Time Lord.
Martha: How did you know he's a time lord.
Mr Gollum: Because my people the Catopulses with killed by Time Lords in the time war. How many r left then Doctor. MG looking at the Doctor
The Doctor: I'm the lone survivor. But what r u gonna accomplish by destroying Earth hmm Destruction in your path.
TD soons realises what Gollum plan is.
The Doctor: U're trying to drain the earth of power and air so u can fly your ship to your planet. I can't believe you r so thick.
Mr Gollum: How dare u call me thick i'm smarter than u.
The Doctor: Ahh but you don't know what i'm capable of.
Mr Gollum: What
The Doctor pushes MG into the burning gas cylinder and it explodes
Martha: That showed him right
Leo: R u ok Doctor
The Doctor: Yep i'm good
Martha, TD & Leo go back and have christmas lunch at Martha's mum's house.
Great diva!!! - but POOR OLD DIRKY!!!!!!!

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Old 13-04-2007, 21:57
Cicero22
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Originally Posted by SneakyBoo
Nearly 55000 posts you guys.....look
Whats our next target Muttley - its not the one thats over 100 000 posts is it?
[List][*]Admin Edit: This thread is continued here: Dirk ♥ Starbuck ♥ Face ♥ ...Appreciation (merged)[/List]
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