Paul Torrisi - "I am a Roman Catholic and as God is my witness, I shook her hand outside."
Sir Alan Sugar - "Yeah? Well, I'm Jewish and I couldn't care less."
Some quotes from somewhere, none are commented on by me:
"I've never had a problem with stepping up to the plate." - Salesman Alex kicks off a whole episode of clichéd corporate gobbledegook with this well-loved classic.
"There are two types of people in the world: winners and… I can't say it, and I won't say it." - I can, Ian. The phrase you seek is: 'Winners and Ians'.
"I am a natural born salesman. The spoken word is my tool." - Raef stakes his claim to be this year's Tre Azam.
"As a salesperson I rate myself as probably the best in Europe." - Jenny Maguire has ideas way above her station.
"Alchemy… it's kind of like making magic." - No, Kevin, it is not.
"It says turkey on the side. Is that where it's from or…?" - Lindi shows her hand early: she is without doubt a 24-carat imbecile.
"I am going to fight to the death in that boardroom." - Raef over-exaggerates his tactics for boardroom survival.
"I literally left with my hands bleeding." - No, Raef, you didn't.
"If stuff comes back from the laundry that I don't like I sling it back at them." - Pity the poor laundrette that has to deal with Sir Alan's smalls.
"You are not capable of acknowledging where you went wrong." - It's unclear whether Jenny was talking to Lucinda or herself at this point.
"We're taking the problem straight by the horns." - Mixed metaphor hell from Raef.
"I have had experience of laundry equipment… in Bosnia." - Simon was lieutenant in charge of clean pants during his time in the army.
"I come from a sales background where I've been highly successful." - Not this week you weren't, Jenny.
Paul Torrisi - "I am a Roman Catholic and as God is my witness, I shook her hand outside."
Sir Alan Sugar - "Yeah? Well, I'm Jewish and I couldn't care less."
I have just been watching series 1 again on the computer and when SAS said that I was in stitches. That as to be my all time fav.
Comments
Reminiscent of the Bigus Dickus scene in The Life of Brian...
God, I love Kevin
Oopps.
That should read :
"Does Simon look like Robert De Niro".
(what the hell was I thinking ?! )
Glad I'm not the only one who can appreciate the comedy value in Kevin! So glad he was kept in!
Kevin, after a slight pause: "Well, I've seen it in Italian restaurants..."
Actually, it was even better, because, as Harry Hill picked up, SAS said: Kelvin Kleins.
I thought his head was going to burst.
from last series:
Paul Torrisi - "I am a Roman Catholic and as God is my witness, I shook her hand outside."
Sir Alan Sugar - "Yeah? Well, I'm Jewish and I couldn't care less."
Some quotes from somewhere, none are commented on by me:
"I've never had a problem with stepping up to the plate." - Salesman Alex kicks off a whole episode of clichéd corporate gobbledegook with this well-loved classic.
"There are two types of people in the world: winners and… I can't say it, and I won't say it." - I can, Ian. The phrase you seek is: 'Winners and Ians'.
"I am a natural born salesman. The spoken word is my tool." - Raef stakes his claim to be this year's Tre Azam.
"As a salesperson I rate myself as probably the best in Europe." - Jenny Maguire has ideas way above her station.
"Alchemy… it's kind of like making magic." - No, Kevin, it is not.
"It says turkey on the side. Is that where it's from or…?" - Lindi shows her hand early: she is without doubt a 24-carat imbecile.
"I am going to fight to the death in that boardroom." - Raef over-exaggerates his tactics for boardroom survival.
"I literally left with my hands bleeding." - No, Raef, you didn't.
"If stuff comes back from the laundry that I don't like I sling it back at them." - Pity the poor laundrette that has to deal with Sir Alan's smalls.
"You are not capable of acknowledging where you went wrong." - It's unclear whether Jenny was talking to Lucinda or herself at this point.
"We're taking the problem straight by the horns." - Mixed metaphor hell from Raef.
"I have had experience of laundry equipment… in Bosnia." - Simon was lieutenant in charge of clean pants during his time in the army.
"I come from a sales background where I've been highly successful." - Not this week you weren't, Jenny.
"There's already clicks going on." - That's 'cliques', Lucinda.
"There's absolutely no point making a fuss. I can't stand whiners." - Whines project leader Raef.
"She lied, she complained, she manipulated other people…" - Jenny sticks the knife in to Shazia.
That has to be the stupidest quote of the series. When the **** did she do any of those things? urgh.
Yeah that really confused me. Ive not a clue why Shazia didnt stick up for herself there and say "erm wtf when?" because thats what i was thinking
Lucinda: "How DARE you!!!"
Helene: "Oh, for god's sake..."
"I think it's pissed her off..."
"I just felt like telling her to shut the f*ck up."
"I didn't really give a shit what anyone else was going to say."
Love the girl.
Oh well, now I do :eek::(
"Alex ........ You stepped so far back you were practically out of the room."
I have just been watching series 1 again on the computer and when SAS said that I was in stitches. That as to be my all time fav.
(of Essex) "The sky is blue, the grass is green and the women are orange"
& when "charming" the lady customers : "Get yourself on my settee right now!"
"Let the camera create the illusion that you're wearing something nice..."
Alex being all moany : "Glamour's not a theme, it's a word."
AND I had forgotten last week, Kevin "The only head chef in the village" returning to the house from the boardroom
"Booyaka!"
(WTF??!)
I think it was Michael Snuffleupagus who said that
Lol !!!
Lucinda: "I'm technically useless."
Alex: "Don't dilute you responsibility, blah blah blah weasel weasel weasel slimy slimy gitfaced babble..."
Simon: "Claire, will you do it?"
Claire: "Yep."
The way she said it and with her accent it was just so funny
Raef: "I think we should all have fake moustaches and talk in italian accents"
'Oh bollocks'
The fact these were his only words in the episode (I think) made them that more sweeter