A complete ban will never work and will just make her feel guilty and resentful so maybe its an idea to sign up yourself online and your daughter can follow the plan?
However I do worry that because she is so young she may end up with deep rooted issue re: weight and food etc and could maybe do with speaking to a professional?
That's just my view though
Oh I agree. This is why I have tried to not make an issue out of it. I don't really want to now but just need to stop her weight escalating
I must admit it was the points thing that made me think of WW... the idea of nothing being banned as long as you keep track of points would mean she could still have some of the stuff that she loves (which is chocolate, biscuits etc)
fireflies, take a look at www.foodfocus.co.uk. Another FM introduced it to the "weight loss 2008" thread last week, and a few people in there have already lost a few pounds losing it. Like WW, nothing is off limits - it's basically just a food diary. It gives you a goal to aim for every day, which is a certain number of calories that you need to try and hit.
I'm aware this isn't the kind of thing you necessarily want a 12 year old to get hung up on, but maybe something you could do for her? It does make you more aware of what you're eating, and helps you balance out the amount of fat, protein, etc that you're getting.
As someone else suggested find something you can do together - it may even be an idea to invest in a fitness wii or something (I don't know much about them to be honest?)
When she has (for example) a choccie does she have snack size bars - if not with her agreement I guess you could try to swap a big choccie bar for say a piece of fruit and a smaller choccie?
It's hard going to totally re-educate yourself regarding food, but your daughter has youth on her side though and if she wants to then it can be done!!! I realise its the her "wanting" to part that may be problematic though and this si why I think you may need to speak to someone properly trained in this field
Does she speak to you openly and freely about her weight? How honest are you with her? Do you pacify her by maybe "pretending" you aren't as concerned as you are. Is WW her idea or your's?
She is actually getting that for her birthday next month. I'm hoping it's a fun way for her to get a bit of exercise!
As someone else suggested find something you can do together - it may even be an idea to invest in a fitness wii or something (I don't know much about them to be honest?)
When she has (for example) a choccie does she have snack size bars - if not with her agreement I guess you could try to swap a big choccie bar for say a piece of fruit and a smaller choccie?
It's hard going to totally re-educate yourself regarding food, but your daughter has youth on her side though and if she wants to then it can be done!!! I realise its the her "wanting" to part that may be problematic though and this si why I think you may need to speak to someone properly trained in this field
Does she speak to you openly and freely about her weight? How honest are you with her? Do you pacify her by maybe "pretending" you aren't as concerned as you are. Is WW her idea or your's?
I have never suggested WW or any slimming club to her. Or to even consult the GP. But we do talk about her weight .. Especially when she wants clothes that just won't fit her or suit her size. I have always tried not to make a big issue out of it. She knows she needs to lose weight but her desire to eat that cake often outweighs her desire to lose the weight! But she does definitely want to shift some of the weight now
fireflies, take a look at www.foodfocus.co.uk. Another FM introduced it to the "weight loss 2008" thread last week, and a few people in there have already lost a few pounds losing it. Like WW, nothing is off limits - it's basically just a food diary. It gives you a goal to aim for every day, which is a certain number of calories that you need to try and hit.
I'm aware this isn't the kind of thing you necessarily want a 12 year old to get hung up on, but maybe something you could do for her? It does make you more aware of what you're eating, and helps you balance out the amount of fat, protein, etc that you're getting.
Hi Simon... I have struggled with weight in my adult life but not as a child. I started to gain weight around 18. Unfortunately my husbands side of the family are all pretty big but not just as young teens... they have remained big through into adulthood. This is what I want to try to address with my daughter as I know she isn't happy.
BTW... well done at addressing your weight issues!
I was ashamed of my weight and never addressed the situation i just let it spiral out of control.
I finally got a hold of it when i stepped on the scales and saw for myself the extent of my gains!
Your daughter has the benefit of you backing her, which is the first huge step, ideally you both should sit down together and talk things through.
My parents thought they were feeding my healthily but i would buy food on my way home from school!! So there are means if you want it!
Once she is starting to lose weight and look and feel better the rest will be easier, once i started to lose the weight i never looked back, baby steps are key and making any "exercise" fun, whether that be activites or sports that she enjoys or joining clubs etc.
As i said before the diet is key, if you would like me to look over a typical eating plan that she has feel free to PM me it i will be more than happy to spot anything.
But again liek i said sit down and speak with her, set targets and goals and set up a reward system for achieving these, and take photos, these are the best way to compare then and now
I have never suggested WW or any slimming club to her. Or to even consult the GP. But we do talk about her weight .. Especially when she wants clothes that just won't fit her or suit her size. I have always tried not to make a big issue out of it. She knows she needs to lose weight but her desire to eat that cake often outweighs her desire to lose the weight! But she does definitely want to shift some of the weight now
I hope I didn't sound as though I was accusing - I was just wondering if you were checking out WW on her behalf, or checking it out off you're own back as to use the information to help your daughter get back on track.
You sound as though you're doing a wonderful job, it must be so hard to tread the line between sensitivity and wanting to take drastic action
Just support her, offer to cater for a more healthy diet for her and tell her that she can still have treats. I think speaking about it, keeping channels of communication open and being honest is the best policy.
Its so hard, as an adult people learn with their bodies but as a child it must be awful, and awful to watch.
I hope you make some headway and I'm sure things will be fine in the end
I was ashamed of my weight and never addressed the situation i just let it spiral out of control.
I finally got a hold of it when i stepped on the scales and saw for myself the extent of my gains!
Your daughter has the benefit of you backing her, which is the first huge step, ideally you both should sit down together and talk things through.
My parents thought they were feeding my healthily but i would buy food on my way home from school!! So there are means if you want it!
Once she is starting to lose weight and look and feel better the rest will be easier, once i started to lose the weight i never looked back, baby steps are key and making any "exercise" fun, whether that be activites or sports that she enjoys or joining clubs etc.
As i said before the diet is key, if you would like me to look over a typical eating plan that she has feel free to PM me it i will be more than happy to spot anything.
But again liek i said sit down and speak with her, set targets and goals and set up a reward system for achieving these, and take photos, these are the best way to compare then and now
I hope I didn't sound as though I was accusing - I was just wondering if you were checking out WW on her behalf, or checking it out off you're own back as to use the information to help your daughter get back on track.
You sound as though you're doing a wonderful job, it must be so hard to tread the line between sensitivity and wanting to take drastic action
Just support her, offer to cater for a more healthy diet for her and tell her that she can still have treats. I think speaking about it, keeping channels of communication open and being honest is the best policy.
Its so hard, as an adult people learn with their bodies but as a child it must be awful, and awful to watch.
I hope you make some headway and I'm sure things will be fine in the end
IMO, RAINBOWGIRL22 & Simon1987 are giving the best advice in all this. I think sending a PM to Simon1987 would be a really good idea.
Food isn't just something that makes you put on weight: it's the fuel you put in your body. If you put good fuel in your body, it will not only look better - it will work better.
Also, the food you eat influences more than just your weight. It also influences your mood, energy levels and your ability to function in your basic, daily life. I find that if I eat rubbish for too long, I get really lazy and moody and tired.
Speak to a nutritionist/dietician - I think he/she will encourage you daughter to have a *much* happier & healthier relationship with food *and* give her a better sense of well-being & self-image. To me, WW and SW seem to be all about angst, worry and calorie-counting (ie. miserable as hell) - nutritionist/dieticians to be more about educating and empowering people to let them decide what they should be eating.
As for sport, there are lots of different sports out there, so maybe get her to try different ones - dancing can just be seen as having fun but it is also really good for fitness. Swimming is a really good all-over body exercise. If you can do a sport/dancing class together, you could provide her with support and encouragement.
Exercise is something that *everyone* should try to do, regardless of whether or not you are overweight. Apparently 70% of depression can be avoided by doing regular exercise. I know that when I do exercise, it helps me think more clearly, concentrate better and feel happier.
Good luck & I hope your daughter manages to lose weight in a happy and healthy way.
One thing I am trying to address is that she drinks more water. I know that does help
Thats great! Make sure that it is chilled water....
The body is made up of a large percentage of water, the body uses it for many things, but for the body to use the water it first has to heat it up to body temp, therefore if you drink ice cold/chilled water the body has to take it from 1-5 degrees up to around 70 i think it is possibly more. This process burns a lot of calories.
So thats calories being burnt for just sitting there drinking.....lol always good
Thats great! Make sure that it is chilled water....
The body is made up of a large percentage of water, the body uses it for many things, but for the body to use the water it first has to heat it up to body temp, therefore if you drink ice cold/chilled water the body has to take it from 1-5 degrees up to around 70 i think it is possibly more. This process burns a lot of calories.
So thats calories being burnt for just sitting there drinking.....lol always good
I once saw the maths for this theory - I forget the actual numbers but the amount of calories it helps you burn is pretty small, something like 14000 a YEAR, or about 40 per day. Still - it's something.
And to be honest, most people prefer refridgerated water anyway - it's just more pleasant!
I once saw the maths for this theory - I forget the actual numbers but the amount of calories it helps you burn is pretty small, something like 14000 a YEAR, or about 40 per day. Still - it's something.
And to be honest, most people prefer refridgerated water anyway - it's just more pleasant!
Lol as i said its a great start, lol 40 is still better than nothing.
If only it was more, could you imagine how easy it would be ti burn calories. Oh well, lol
Drinking water is definitely good - it gives you clearer skin.
But I also find that when I feel really hungry, I get such a craving for junk food. So to not feel hungry, I try to eat good healthy food that gives me energy, is tasty and fills me up.
Maybe you could ask Simon a list of this kind of food & get your daughter to try as many of them as possible. Hopefully she will like some of them & be able to include more of them in her diet.
Simon knows more than I do - I'll leave it to him to advise & he can correct me if I'm wrong in what I've been writing.
Drinking water is definitely good - it gives you clearer skin.
But I also find that when I feel really hungry, I get such a craving for junk food. So to not feel hungry, I try to eat good healthy food that gives me energy, is tasty and fills me up.
Maybe you could ask Simon a list of this kind of food & get your daughter to try as many of them as possible. Hopefully she will be able to include more of this good food into her diet.
She is a really good eater actually. She likes pretty much anything you feed her apart from mushrooms! She just loves junk food a lot too!
She is a really good eater actually. She likes pretty much anything you feed her apart from mushrooms! She just loves junk food a lot too!
OK, so maybe she really likes her food (nothing wrong with that - I believe food is one of life's pleasures) & a little control is needed sometimes. But the fact she likes a wide variety of food is *really* encouraging - it might just be a case of finding food that tastes quite similar to the stuff she likes & getting her to eat that instead or introducing her to new healthy foods.
For example, if she wants to eat something savoury, swap a back of crisps for sesame seed Ryvita and red pepper humous dip. Or instead of eating processed pizza, she could learn to make a healthier version at home.
OK, so maybe she really likes her food (nothing wrong with that - I believe food is one of life's pleasures) & a little control is needed sometimes. But the fact she likes a wide variety of food is *really* encouraging - it might just be a case of finding food that tastes quite similar to the stuff she likes & getting her to eat that instead or introducing her to new healthy foods.
For example, if she wants to eat something savoury, swap a back of crisps for sesame seed Ryvita and red pepper humous dip. Or instead of eating processed pizza, she could learn to make a healthier version at home.
Lol as i said its a great start, lol 40 is still better than nothing.
If only it was more, could you imagine how easy it would be ti burn calories. Oh well, lol
Would be great, wouldn't it.
The water fountain at my gym spurts out the iciest water in the world - maybe they're testing the theory on us?!
OP it really is great that your daughter doesn't turn her nose up at strange foods. fizzypurpleone's suggestions are great, and to add to them - if she fancies something sweet, how about fruit? I'm addicted to mango and pineapple at the moment, they're so tasty. And another good savoury snack is somekind of fruit, seed and nut mix, or sunflower seeds.
Try to make it an adventure - an opportunity to discover a lot of new foods together
The water fountain at my gym spurts out the iciest water in the world - maybe they're testing the theory on us?!
OP it really is great that your daughter doesn't turn her nose up at strange foods. fizzypurpleone's suggestions are great, and to add to them - if she fancies something sweet, how about fruit? I'm addicted to mango and pineapple at the moment, they're so tasty. And another good savoury snack is somekind of fruit, seed and nut mix, or sunflower seeds.
Try to make it an adventure - an opportunity to discover a lot of new foods together
I'm always getting her to eat fruit when she complains of being hungry! I do know she wouldn't eat the seeds and nuts though!
I know children can join Slimming World with a note from the doctors... As on slimming world nothing is off limits and no calorie counting etc... I have no idea about Weight Watchers
WW is the same, they have to have a note from the doctor and I think be supervised by you. I think it may be better (not that I'm putting SW down) as there are two different plans you can follow.
edit: and they have cakes and snack bars available now, with the points worked out so you can take them off your daily allowance..
Hi - I actually think taking your daughter to WW is a positive step. It's something you can do together, so you're giving her moral support. I know a few people that when they join WW, they've all done the dieting thing and tend to believe that if you eat less it less helps you lose weight, of course then you feel deprived and end up putting it back on.
WW encourages you to eat plenty, even the foods you love, but just modify the content. It does educate you and will help you to understand the pitfalls. Time and time again when I was there if someone hadn't lost much, surprisingly it was usually because they hadn't eaten enough!
Comments
Thanks.. I'll check that out
Oh I agree. This is why I have tried to not make an issue out of it. I don't really want to now but just need to stop her weight escalating
fireflies, take a look at www.foodfocus.co.uk. Another FM introduced it to the "weight loss 2008" thread last week, and a few people in there have already lost a few pounds losing it. Like WW, nothing is off limits - it's basically just a food diary. It gives you a goal to aim for every day, which is a certain number of calories that you need to try and hit.
I'm aware this isn't the kind of thing you necessarily want a 12 year old to get hung up on, but maybe something you could do for her? It does make you more aware of what you're eating, and helps you balance out the amount of fat, protein, etc that you're getting.
I have never suggested WW or any slimming club to her. Or to even consult the GP. But we do talk about her weight .. Especially when she wants clothes that just won't fit her or suit her size. I have always tried not to make a big issue out of it. She knows she needs to lose weight but her desire to eat that cake often outweighs her desire to lose the weight! But she does definitely want to shift some of the weight now
Thanks for the link. I will def check it out
I was ashamed of my weight and never addressed the situation i just let it spiral out of control.
I finally got a hold of it when i stepped on the scales and saw for myself the extent of my gains!
Your daughter has the benefit of you backing her, which is the first huge step, ideally you both should sit down together and talk things through.
My parents thought they were feeding my healthily but i would buy food on my way home from school!! So there are means if you want it!
Once she is starting to lose weight and look and feel better the rest will be easier, once i started to lose the weight i never looked back, baby steps are key and making any "exercise" fun, whether that be activites or sports that she enjoys or joining clubs etc.
As i said before the diet is key, if you would like me to look over a typical eating plan that she has feel free to PM me it i will be more than happy to spot anything.
But again liek i said sit down and speak with her, set targets and goals and set up a reward system for achieving these, and take photos, these are the best way to compare then and now
simon
Excellent - it looks like fun!!!
I hope I didn't sound as though I was accusing - I was just wondering if you were checking out WW on her behalf, or checking it out off you're own back as to use the information to help your daughter get back on track.
You sound as though you're doing a wonderful job, it must be so hard to tread the line between sensitivity and wanting to take drastic action
Just support her, offer to cater for a more healthy diet for her and tell her that she can still have treats. I think speaking about it, keeping channels of communication open and being honest is the best policy.
Its so hard, as an adult people learn with their bodies but as a child it must be awful, and awful to watch.
I hope you make some headway and I'm sure things will be fine in the end
Thanks Simon. I appreciate all your advice
Food isn't just something that makes you put on weight: it's the fuel you put in your body. If you put good fuel in your body, it will not only look better - it will work better.
Also, the food you eat influences more than just your weight. It also influences your mood, energy levels and your ability to function in your basic, daily life. I find that if I eat rubbish for too long, I get really lazy and moody and tired.
Speak to a nutritionist/dietician - I think he/she will encourage you daughter to have a *much* happier & healthier relationship with food *and* give her a better sense of well-being & self-image. To me, WW and SW seem to be all about angst, worry and calorie-counting (ie. miserable as hell) - nutritionist/dieticians to be more about educating and empowering people to let them decide what they should be eating.
As for sport, there are lots of different sports out there, so maybe get her to try different ones - dancing can just be seen as having fun but it is also really good for fitness. Swimming is a really good all-over body exercise. If you can do a sport/dancing class together, you could provide her with support and encouragement.
Exercise is something that *everyone* should try to do, regardless of whether or not you are overweight. Apparently 70% of depression can be avoided by doing regular exercise. I know that when I do exercise, it helps me think more clearly, concentrate better and feel happier.
Good luck & I hope your daughter manages to lose weight in a happy and healthy way.
Thats great! Make sure that it is chilled water....
The body is made up of a large percentage of water, the body uses it for many things, but for the body to use the water it first has to heat it up to body temp, therefore if you drink ice cold/chilled water the body has to take it from 1-5 degrees up to around 70 i think it is possibly more. This process burns a lot of calories.
So thats calories being burnt for just sitting there drinking.....lol always good
I once saw the maths for this theory - I forget the actual numbers but the amount of calories it helps you burn is pretty small, something like 14000 a YEAR, or about 40 per day. Still - it's something.
And to be honest, most people prefer refridgerated water anyway - it's just more pleasant!
Lol as i said its a great start, lol 40 is still better than nothing.
If only it was more, could you imagine how easy it would be ti burn calories. Oh well, lol
But I also find that when I feel really hungry, I get such a craving for junk food. So to not feel hungry, I try to eat good healthy food that gives me energy, is tasty and fills me up.
Maybe you could ask Simon a list of this kind of food & get your daughter to try as many of them as possible. Hopefully she will like some of them & be able to include more of them in her diet.
Simon knows more than I do - I'll leave it to him to advise & he can correct me if I'm wrong in what I've been writing.
She is a really good eater actually. She likes pretty much anything you feed her apart from mushrooms! She just loves junk food a lot too!
I am offline now unitl tomorrow, keep us all informed i know i will be interested in the progress your daughter will be making.
Good Luck
Simon
OK, so maybe she really likes her food (nothing wrong with that - I believe food is one of life's pleasures) & a little control is needed sometimes. But the fact she likes a wide variety of food is *really* encouraging - it might just be a case of finding food that tastes quite similar to the stuff she likes & getting her to eat that instead or introducing her to new healthy foods.
For example, if she wants to eat something savoury, swap a back of crisps for sesame seed Ryvita and red pepper humous dip. Or instead of eating processed pizza, she could learn to make a healthier version at home.
Yes... good suggestion.
Would be great, wouldn't it.
The water fountain at my gym spurts out the iciest water in the world - maybe they're testing the theory on us?!
OP it really is great that your daughter doesn't turn her nose up at strange foods. fizzypurpleone's suggestions are great, and to add to them - if she fancies something sweet, how about fruit? I'm addicted to mango and pineapple at the moment, they're so tasty. And another good savoury snack is somekind of fruit, seed and nut mix, or sunflower seeds.
Try to make it an adventure - an opportunity to discover a lot of new foods together
I'm always getting her to eat fruit when she complains of being hungry! I do know she wouldn't eat the seeds and nuts though!
WW is the same, they have to have a note from the doctor and I think be supervised by you. I think it may be better (not that I'm putting SW down) as there are two different plans you can follow.
edit: and they have cakes and snack bars available now, with the points worked out so you can take them off your daily allowance..
Couldn't have put it better myself.
Yes, where possible, food/life/whatever should definitely be about fun and adventure.
WW encourages you to eat plenty, even the foods you love, but just modify the content. It does educate you and will help you to understand the pitfalls. Time and time again when I was there if someone hadn't lost much, surprisingly it was usually because they hadn't eaten enough!
Good luck to you both.