Huge Fat Porkers You've Been Told

BobbyNoMates · 11/09/08 - 23:43

Having watched the 9/11 Faker tonight on C4, then read the thread on here, I'm amazed at the ability some people have of carrying off huge, elaborate lies. So I was just wondering if anyone here had ever been taken in (or not) by someone's massive lie?

mildredhubble · 12/09/08 - 00:50

Nope, I had to answer this thread as I don't want you being BobbyNoMates forever

Lyricalis · 12/09/08 - 00:52

I was told that if I worked hard that my employer would reward me for it, I was told that during the interview and during the induction process, and it turned out to be a huge great porker of a lie. Never ever trust anyone with a suit and with less hair than you. If you are bald don't even trust yourself. :eek::o

[Deleted User] · 12/09/08 - 00:52

Yeah that there was a father christmas and a tooth fairy

[Deleted User] · 12/09/08 - 01:02

Guy at college said his mate used to THROW the bowling ball, and he said one time his mate threw it so hard it went threw the window at the back of the alley and into the sea

He also said the police came and his friend threw a bowling ball at a policeman and it pushed the policeman back through a window

He was about 50, no kidding

He talked grade-A bullplop

And he never listened to anyone, he always had to interrupt saying he had done/been/seen/been something better

cosmo · 12/09/08 - 01:20

When she was about 9 my daughter's schoolmate swore that her dad lived in a huge castle in Italy and that she once went to four weddings a a funeral in one day.

Kids n porkies.

James2001 · 12/09/08 - 01:27

My dad's told my several stories I treat with suspicion. I don't know whether they're actual lies or not, but I find them very unlikely. One involved him punching his teacher, another involved him smashing a soda syphon over a bloke's head in a pub. In both stories he got away with the acts unpunished due to some unlikely circumstances (supposedly the teacher realised he "deserved it" so didn't report my dad, and everyone in the pub supposedly hated the other bloke, so they gave the police a false description).

looneybop · 12/09/08 - 02:14

The first driving instrutor I had was very dodgy and was trying to drag out my lessons so he made more money out of me.

He told me to dispense the clutch whenever going round corners. Very dangerous

Ja'mie King · 12/09/08 - 02:45

I know of a bouncer who works in various places in this area. He told my OH that he was working for Simon Cowell as a body guard but then couldn't be bothered doing it any more so started a company that got him £700 a day. But apparently he got fed up with that so he decided to work as a door man:rolleyes:

Making huge amounts of money must get mundane.

Radiomaniac · 12/09/08 - 02:46

A whopper I got told was that this guy, who was an acquaintance of my mate, was a Metropolitan police officer.

I suspected he was lying from the start (see the 'Are you gullible' thread - answer 'No'!) but my mate insisted he was - and he certainly looked and acted the part - he was a complete fantasist.

Long story short, he wasn't genuine and got stopped and searched one night by real police, got found out - although they didn't charge him (even though he got involved with minor cases dealing with the public!)

He then disappeared, probably to do it again in another area.

Ja'mie King · 12/09/08 - 02:52

Radiomaniac wrote: »

A whopper I got told was that this guy, who was an acquaintance of my mate, was a Metropolitan police officer.

I suspected he was lying from the start (see the 'Are you gullible' thread - answer 'No'!) but my mate insisted he was - and he certainly looked and acted the part - he was a complete fantasist.

Long story short, he wasn't genuine and got stopped and searched one night by real police, got found out - although they didn't charge him (even though he got involved with minor cases dealing with the public!)

He then disappeared, probably to do it again in another area.

There was a man in the North of Scotland (I think) who went about in a battered car with a siren and pretended he was in the police. Got found out though and it hit the news not that long ago:D

I seem to know loads of liars. Maybe I attract them?

The worst one was my friend's ex. On a night out me and her got really annoyed by some guys who were harassing us. He totally backed away and you wouldn't have even known he was with us.

Anyway, I nearly ended up smacking one of them and when we got outside friends ex came out, put his arms around us and said "thanks for holding me back, you two" :eek::eek:

He was bad for making stuff up. Some people just have problems I suppose

System · 12/09/08 - 04:14

My first proper boyfriend told me that he loved me and wanted to spend his life with me. I discovered soon after that he was using me and it was all lies. His girlfriend was away on a course in London and he fancied a bit of rumpy. The barsteward! :mad:

Hugh Jarse · 12/09/08 - 04:16

When I was at school some teacher tried to tell me that some bloke called God created the earth & everything in it. Not only that, but he also had a son whose mother was a virgin and he could perform all kinds of party tricks like turning water into wine & stuff. What a guy.

How the teacher kept a straight face while telling us those whoppers, I'll never know.

yorkiegal · 12/09/08 - 04:23

my friends little girl told all her schoolmates that she flew to america on concord at the weekends, and once told the teacher she was going blind and that was why she couldn't do her work.

mattwoodfield · 12/09/08 - 07:08

We have a lad at work in the warehouse, and he just keeps lieing through his teeth constantly. He is what you would call a compulsive liar.... but i have to give it to him, some of his stories from the weekend have been corkers, especially if he has just come back from a week off work... brilliant.

[Deleted User] · 12/09/08 - 07:48

cute chick wrote: »

My first proper boyfriend told me that he loved me and wanted to spend his life with me. I discovered soon after that he was using me and it was all lies. His girlfriend was away on a course in London and he fancied a bit of rumpy. The barsteward! :mad:

But did you ever tell him "Oh my that's a big porker?"

System · 12/09/08 - 08:51

I was once given an email address by someone on here... I added them to facebook, and months after they'd been banned I had a look and... they'd not only lied about their name, but their gender, age and location. Lovely.

System · 12/09/08 - 08:52

Joni M wrote: »

I once got told that someone I use to talk to occasionally, Jill, was married to her toyboy, she had a daughter who was 15, her neighbours were interesting and she was psychic.

Turns out it wasn't true..... whilst it didn't bother me that much it turned out that the lies were so elaborate that it was tantamount to multiple personality disorder by proxy.

Anyways I've 'spoken' to her since and the condition remains...... I can only wish her well.

*blows hugs and kisses* xxxx

Ja'mie King wrote: »

hmm.... I'm pretty sure I know her too.

What a coincidence!:eek:;)

It's a small, small world girls, because guess what? I know her too!

drum · 12/09/08 - 08:52

" I promise not to come in your mouth honey"

LYING BASTARD!!!! :mad:

LOL

hey! It's Friday....

[Deleted User] · 12/09/08 - 08:54

fafita2786 wrote: »

It's a small, small world girls, because guess what? I know her too!

Was it someone who used to barge into every thread with some inane stuff about "my OH" ?

System · 12/09/08 - 09:32

fafita2786 wrote: »

I was once given an email address by someone on here... I added them to facebook, and months after they'd been banned I had a look and... they'd not only lied about their name, but their gender, age and location. Lovely.

OMG :eek::eek::eek:

System · 12/09/08 - 09:40

Cazza23 wrote: »

OMG :eek::eek::eek:

I know... Weird, huh? :eek:

System · 12/09/08 - 09:46

Joni M wrote: »

I once got told that someone I use to talk to occasionally, Jill, was married to her toyboy, she had a daughter who was 15, her neighbours were interesting and she was psychic.

Turns out it wasn't true..... whilst it didn't bother me that much it turned out that the lies were so elaborate that it was tantamount to multiple personality disorder by proxy.

Anyways I've 'spoken' to her since and the condition remains...... I can only wish her well.

*blows hugs and kisses* xxxx

Ja'mie King wrote: »

hmm.... I'm pretty sure I know her too.

What a coincidence!:eek:;)

Madridista23 wrote: »

This IS a coincidence. I am almost certain i know of the same person. :eek: :eek:

Neck_Romancer wrote: »

Was it someone who used to barge into every thread with some inane stuff about "my OH" ?

ahhhhh the penny has just dropped!!!

RAINBOWGIRL22 · 12/09/08 - 09:55

Joni M wrote: »

I once got told that someone I use to talk to occasionally, Jill, was married to her toyboy, she had a daughter who was 15, her neighbours were interesting and she was psychic.

Turns out it wasn't true..... whilst it didn't bother me that much it turned out that the lies were so elaborate that it was tantamount to multiple personality disorder by proxy.

Anyways I've 'spoken' to her since and the condition remains...... I can only wish her well.

*blows hugs and kisses* xxxx

The lovely Jill hey???

So was absolutely nothing about "her" true then? :eek:

Imogen M · 12/09/08 - 09:56

I'd never have the energy to lie and keep track of it all. It must be really tiring!

[Deleted User] · 12/09/08 - 10:08

A certain somebody with big blue eyes looked at me unflinchingly and told me the cat had posted the remains of a jam sandwich in the video recorder .... "Honestly!"

Hey there!

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