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Is it such a bad thing to spoil your kids?
Xela M
Posts: 4,710 Forum Member
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I know people say you shouldn't spoil your kids or buy them what they want. However, I was wondering if it really is such a bad thing?
When I was growing up my parents always gave in to any of my silly requests and bought me anything I asked for (even a dog!). They treated my brother the same way (we have a large age gap), and although they were never terribly well-off financially, they would get tickets to the moon if we asked them nicely
Even though both me and my brother could be mouthy at times, I'd like to think that we nevertheless grew up to be respectful and kind adults and we both appreciate what our parents had done for us. (Although we don't show it often enough :rolleyes:)
I have a little girl and I bring her up the same way. I usually spoil her rotten
I was told by many that I'm doing wrong and that she'll grow up to be a disrespectful spoilt brat and that I will live to regret it.
What do people think?
When I was growing up my parents always gave in to any of my silly requests and bought me anything I asked for (even a dog!). They treated my brother the same way (we have a large age gap), and although they were never terribly well-off financially, they would get tickets to the moon if we asked them nicely
Even though both me and my brother could be mouthy at times, I'd like to think that we nevertheless grew up to be respectful and kind adults and we both appreciate what our parents had done for us. (Although we don't show it often enough :rolleyes:)
I have a little girl and I bring her up the same way. I usually spoil her rotten
I was told by many that I'm doing wrong and that she'll grow up to be a disrespectful spoilt brat and that I will live to regret it.What do people think?
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you dont do kids any favours if you dont teach them the value of money
In this day and age, yes.
No to spoiled brats
this is what kids tend to expect these days, and hence we end up with them looting and rioting.
We all thought he was a ****, which was a correct assumption, but the fact he was totally spoilt, and surrounded by kids who wanted to drive his 50cc quad or play the latest game he thought he was dead popular, which made him even more of a ****.
Guess who has no mates these days, or anyone even hardly remembers?
Don't spoil your kid, it's not character building.
I give my children everything they need and some of what they want.They know the value of things and save money for things like x box games. When they save say £15 then I typically pay for the rest of the game if its like £40.
I was the youngest growing up and I was spoiled but I didn't get away with murder at home. My parents were strict, I knew the line and when not to cross it.
My best friend's children are spoiled rotten to the point they are unbearable. They don't understand the word "no" unless its folllowed by a tantrum and I remember telling them they couldnt have a certain toy as I had "no pennies " to which one of them replied "Just go and take more out the bank" The child was four at the time!
The kids have more toys in their bedrooms than Toys R Us and probably more clothes than their parents but the kids don't really appreciate it or care!
I try really hard not to spoil my own two little girls as tempting as it can be because I don't want them behaving in the way I've just described. I don't want them to become brats nor do I want to be one of those mums that buys their kids something because they can't bear to say no!
I agree with this, though just very occasionally I spoil them by buying something they want. Done this way it makes it special and they don't take it for granted.
Spoil your kid = makes you feel good in the present.
Spoilt kid all grown up = no mates, no job, blames mum.
If you raise a spoilt little brat, you're doing him a disservice,as you're screwing up his future, no matter how good it makes you feel to spoil him in the present day.
I know many people who went to private school; who were also spoilt. I don't know a single one (except a guy with cancer) who doesn't have a job, mates, or blames their mum for the upbringing they had.
My parents were comfortable, as were most of my mates parents, but they taught us the value of money, and I'm glad they did. You're assuming that kids that aren't spoilt, have parents with money problems? I'd bet a years wages that you were hideously spoilt as a kid, and had not only every single Star Wars action figure, but the Millennium Falcon, and all the spaceships and extra gadgets
As long as they are taught loving and giving values as well, then its not going to harm them..
I agree children should be children as long as possible. Lets be honest they grow up fast enough these days!
But that said if you (and I'm not meaning you personally Xela)allow yourself to get into debt just so you can keep up with your child's demands then more fool the parents I say. At the end of the day children can still have brilliant childhoods even if they know their parents dont have bottomless pits of cash. I think its best that children don't grow up with the mantra "What I want I get" as they will be in for a nasty shock when they realise life is not like that.
Love, affection and spending quality time with your children cannot be bought.
you forgot to say Spoiler Alert!
ahem, I ll get me coat