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Hazel Threatened Daley's masculinity
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Before Daley grabbed Hazel by the throat, she was goading him to "be a man". Initially, he responded "It's 2013, I don't have to act like a man anymore. It's equality now!"
But Hazel persisted goading him. Therefore I speculate that this caused Daley to feel like he had to prove himself as a man by the old fashioned standards that Hazel was demanding. So he grabbed her by the throat and told her to respect his authority.
Hazel wanted to test the limits of Daley's masculintiy. She wanted to see how much of a man he could be. She wanted a man who would speak to her in a way that she's never been spoken to before. When she walked to the chair looking worried it was because she realised that she had taken the test too far for BB. She was terrified that Daley would get into trouble and that it was all her fault for threatening his masculinity.
But Hazel persisted goading him. Therefore I speculate that this caused Daley to feel like he had to prove himself as a man by the old fashioned standards that Hazel was demanding. So he grabbed her by the throat and told her to respect his authority.
Hazel wanted to test the limits of Daley's masculintiy. She wanted to see how much of a man he could be. She wanted a man who would speak to her in a way that she's never been spoken to before. When she walked to the chair looking worried it was because she realised that she had taken the test too far for BB. She was terrified that Daley would get into trouble and that it was all her fault for threatening his masculinity.
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That's a new take. And a possible interpretation with some merit.
Are these challenging a mans masculinity too?
If Daley truly believed in the 2013 equality between the sexes he would not have reacted in the way that he did.
His response and behaviour was a direct result of patriarchal stereo typing of the gender roles and the belief in male supremacy over a woman, this is the largest single cause of sexism against women and domestic violence and rape in the first place.
It was a sexual 'role play' game ... Hazel gave Daley the idea that she wanted to act out having 'a bit of rough' ... and he obliged
That's why he was so gobsmacked in the diaryroom when BB said Hazel told them she felt 'cornered' by his aggressiveness
... and it was why every other housemate was equally gobsmacked that he had been thrown out
He's a bum for sure, but she played him like a fiddle ... she really did
The housemates know it
I think all the sharp objects had been removed from the safe house.
oh come on
He wanted to f*** her ... not fight her
... she knew that ( and was excited by it )
It's rubbish for her ... or anyone else, to say she was 'terrified'
pah
I agree 100%. I don't care how inarticulate a man is or how much a woman eggs him on to be a man. You don't grab someone by the neck - no matter how lightly - to prove your prowess.
Hazel is a troublemaker and pushes people, but even she did not expect this outcome.
I just had an ominous feeling about those 2 in the safe house alone. Even in the main house, Daley had this crazy look in his eyes. When talking a person at eye level, he just seemed not all there and seemed to have a controlled aggression. I expected both of them in the safe house would be a strange mix partly due to sexual tension, his inarticulate and crass manner of speaking (talking about her strip), her permissive behavior, and also the fact no one else was around to keep him in line.
I don't know why, it happens behind closed doors. With the Nigella v Saatchi case, we didn't get full access to the conversation, just a single still photo. But in this episode of BB, we got to see the whole thing. It was a unique moment in television history. We got to see something that we don't normally get to see on TV. It was an insight into a previously hidden world.
Television history was made with this episode of Big Brother. Probably the most groundbreaking epsiode in the history of reality TV. It was a shame that BB stopped it halfway through the scene by calling Daley into the diary room. If they had let Daley carry on, maybe we could have got some answers to your questions.
it showed that both of them like to be top dog in the relationship.
he's got the old school values (Dan mentioned it to her on BOTS) and she's the strong new age woman...they both met their match and Daley went too far.
no matter what Hazel would do, a guy like Daley would never let her be in charge..even if he was a kept man from her.
at least it came out in place where it got intervened instead of this happening when they got out and got together for a quick fling.
I agree it was groundbreaking TV, by giving an insight to viewers of this sort of thing .
However as I said in the latter part of my post, the old patriarchal culture and heteronormative gender roles that have followed on from it are one of the main causes of this kind of behaviour towards women.
The male privilege and supremacy has been dominant in society and culture for centuries and is as such indoctrinated and imbedded in the minds of many men.
The whole belief that masculinity equals power and dominance and femininity equals weakness and submissiveness has been a part of culture for so long and it was only just within the last 50 years or that women have gained equality within law and true independence and sexual liberation from male patriarchal oppression.
Patriarchy is men having more power, both personally and politically and culturally than women of the same rank. This imbalance of power is the main core of patriarchy upholding gender norms and gender stereotypes of what a mans role should be and what a womens role should be these roles are set by the very idea of male supremacy.
Sex inequality cannot be routinely enforced through open violence or even blatant discriminatory agreements - patriarchy also needs its values accepted in the minds of people both men and women alike but it is a system that was created by men to empower men as the superior dominant gender over women and to give them privilege.
Patriarchy also shaped men's sexuality so it expresses the theme of domination, in the patriarchal structure for a man to love a women is to have power over her and for her to obey the head of the family unit being the "man" This is what the whole structure of the "Traditional Marriage" and "Courtship" were founded on., So something like new age modern equality for women seriously challenges the whole patriarchal structure and becomes a serious threat to the male dominated heteronormative culture that has been indoctrinated into men`s minds for centuries which explains why so many men tend to dislike women`s equality and feminism if it goes too far or crosses the line if you get me..
Women having authority and also the idea of homosexuality both pose a serious threat to the acceptable gender roles. The patriarchal system has several methods of oppression but the ones it uses most are misogyny, sexism and homophobia, if people break the rules of the structure, such as women challenging a mans masculinity and dominance or gays and in some cases lesbians, they are seen as deviants and the male authority and gender roles are threatened Therefore, attempts are made to force people back into acceptable roles.( putting them in their place) If people refuse to be forced back into particular roles and demand rights or challenge anything, they are punished with oppression, abuse discrimination and sometimes violence often seen with rape of women, domestic violence against women, murders of women/girlfriends, gay bashings and anti gay murders and the corrective rape of lesbian women and sometimes the rape of gay men as a way to shame them and humiliate them and punish them into submission.
But as I say male privilege, though benefiting heterosexual men and putting them in control of society as it were,also oppresses them by setting them at odds with each other, Men compete with each other for status as masculine males. Because masculinity equals power and dominance. you see this all the time in masculine sports such as football, boxing rugby etc which is why they are only seen as games for men.
Misogyny and homophobia are the measure of masculinity. The degree to which a man is thought to treat a woman equality to himself or have homosexual feelings is the degree of his unmanliness. Because patriarchy presents sexuality as man over women part of the general dominance theme, men are conditioned to have only that in mind as a model of their sexual expression.
The thought of sex with another man must mean being dominated, which is very scary stuff. a non patriarchal model of sexual expression as the mutuality of equals doesn't fit, the transfer of the heterosexual model to same-sex relations can at best be "queer" at worst somehow perverted so in turn Gayness is never defended by the majority of men, infact one of the worst things you can call a heterosexual male is gay which is also why boys at school use the anti gay slurs to belittle other boys and why our culture is full of anti gay slurs and insults and so much hate towards anything perceived as gay or effeminate.
Effeminate men be they straight or gay are disliked even more by men they are seen as the bottom of the pile because they are most like women, which is nothing less than treachery to the masculine cause and from a masculine view effeminate equals weakness, less worthy etc, which is why effeminate men are always targets for abuse.
You can clearly see the link here between masculinity and the treatment of women and homophobia towards gay men, thus is why misogyny and homophobia are interlinked.
Daley as one other poster said in this thread, takes his views from the old school style when it comes to women while Hazel is from the modern new age of female independence, they both clashed because of this and both went too far and in Daley`s case out of order.
Daley clearly holds some sexist tendencies by todays standards and is not used to a woman answering him back or challenging his authority, this is made clear by the things he said to Hazel and about Hazel in the Diary Room before he was removed, he was also very sexually frustrated at the time add alcohol into the mix with all the above and you end up with what happened.
Many people mentioned that on Saturday nights live stream that he was coming across as bossy by telling her how to dress and what to wear etc this again could be harmless however it is also likely he was trying to control her in fact some actually thought this at the time.
This.
For starters the guy was drunk, in his own bed and she kept goading him for a hug, he rebuffed her which she didn't like and kept harassing him (although i concede he loved every minute of it) then she slapped him first, each time things went up a notch it was down to her goading him, first slapping him,then taking his covers then pulling down his boxers.. Strange how she got a way scot free, much like she did last week by ending up safe and immune from this weeks nominations.
I know I have said similar when threatened and it is nothing to do with 'testing' someone believe me. I think you are over-analysing it. Oh and grabbing a woman by the throat would not make someone more of a man- not now or even in the 50's.
He was drunk though? she insisted on goading him and there was a whole lot more to what happened that night on live feed, including the whole Charlie and Hazel having a word outside and Daley ordering her to come inside (which was a little sinister to be fair).
Are you a Sociology student? She played him like the psyco git he is. If she was his girlfriend, at home, in private, I have fears. Of her? in this setting? NO
I'm sorry for his real life relationships and children.
Hazel is a player and she played him.
No it wouldn`t make a man any more of a real man at all, however you have to understand how a lot of men who are conditioned by gender roles and stereotypes.
To a man for him to assert his authority over a woman and make her know her place sometimes using threats or violence is a way for him to take control and force her to submit to him, hence asserting his masculinity.
Of course in the modern world of 2013 this is now seen as woman beating and misogyny to the majority of people.
No I am not a student as it happens and I have worked with women who have suffered all forms of domestic abuse.
I agree she is a player, but again that still is no valid excuse for the way he treated her with his aggression.
There are many male players and cheats and liars in society too who play women also, so its no different when a woman does it in my eyes and neither justify threatening behaviour or the level of aggression he showed.
My gosh, have just finished reading your very long lectures for this morning. Are you quite finished lecturing yet?:)
I really don't have to understand. His behaviour was appauling. He didn't assert his masculinity at all, even if he thought that's what he was doing, the guy's a joke. He only managed to get Hazel back in the house by telling a snidey little lie and 'on his kids life'. This on top of the woman bashing sexism, nastily mocking a housemate because of where they are from, smacking her, being generally abusive and grabbing her by the throat.
Quite the opposite of asserting any dominance, I would actually say Daley showed just how weak and inadequate he feels. A confident man is self assured and doesn't need to assert any masculinity- at least not in the way Daley seems to define it.
I'll tell you what he did achieve though. Messing up his relationship with his girlfriend, getting removed from a house he probably spent ages trying to get into, being hated by thousands of viewers for being violent towards a woman. Nice going there pal! Good riddence...
I do agree with you to a certain extent..BUT being with a man who loses it in the end like Daley did..eventually they do not need pushing so far..the end action of having to be the domineering half of the couple will come much sooner and for reasons you cant even work out yourself..which means treading on eggshells in what you say,do,wear and losing who you are.