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People not understanding you when you cant afford something
Funk You
Posts: 6,864 Forum Member
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I dont know if anyone else gets this sort of thing. I "supposed" to be going to a music event in London in conjunction with the radio show I do. I have no money for the train and not enough to get half way either yet I'm getting the impression the person running it thinks I can pull money out of my arse at short notice. >:(
Grinds your gears don't it? Have you had experience of these sorts of people.
Grinds your gears don't it? Have you had experience of these sorts of people.
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I asked my mate if there were any nights out coming up and he said he was skint. Paying out for car, bills, loans etc.
A couple of days later he's organised an all day drinking session, a trip to a chinese buffet and a FIFA tournament on his brand new 50" telly.
Just niggles a bit that when you try to organise something nothings doing but when someone else organises something they expect you to drop everything, find money from somewhere and attend everything.
I have been on the receiving end of that too! I know how you feel its usually on my birthday people drop out yet have money to do other things.
I have. I wish they could get a better job instead of crying off, moaning about being skint all the time.
I assumed if you were invited to someone's house for food then they would be providing it and you wouldn't be expected to pay for it. Also £10 was an awful lot of money for a Chinese back in 1995! I think even if I'd had £10 going spare I still would have gone without on principle!
Reminds me of the time, many years ago now, when some of my friends kept nagging me to do things and I kept telling them I couldn't because I was saving for a car. It seems that the idea of actually saving for something, rather than taking out a loan, is an alien concept to some people. I tried to explain to them that I only consider it 'my money' after I've paid everyone else and put some in savings. If that means there's nothing left then that means no treats. I can still picture that look of incomprehension I got
Hell, I'm so uncomfortable about owing people money that I paid off my first mortgage within 5 years. Granted, this was before those things went sky high, so we're talking 40K and not 250K here.
I have a friend who wouldnt go out and socialise with us because he was "skint". I wouldnt mind being what he defines as skint since he couldnt afford to go for a meal out yet that year he got a new car, went to 2 foreign holidays and got married!
Yet he couldnt find a spare £20 somewhere for a cheap night out.
Maybe he had no money left after loan payments for the car, the holidays and the wedding!
Yeah I know you have lots of money as you have no bills!
Exactly that! its £27 for a ticket half way and I dont even have that at the moment plus I am overdrawn and need to really watch the pennies. The other DJ's on the station live nearer or have cars etc Im unemployed, have hardly any money and find it hard to do some things. I'd probably have to buy drinks too or look a right plank standing there with no pint in my hand I just dont see how I'm expected to do something when I cannot afford to.
Maybe the reason he could afford all those things is because he didn't spend money frivolously. Some people forsake nights out and social events purely for the reason that they are saving for quite expensive things.
Oh yes this annoys me, most of my friends are either childless or have grown up families, my lads are 16 and 14 so when we go on holiday it's much more than it costs a couple. Plus the spending money for four. Add on the new holiday clothes that growing teenage lads need each time we go...So they don't understand when I say I can't do stuff because I need to save for my my holiday.
I think sometimes people just do not understand that others may not have the funds to do something with them.
I used to tell my girl (years ago) just to tell them why she could not join in certain things she was invited to but to wish them a good night or whatever.
She was like you seem to be from your remarks on here at one time and would get annoyed at their lack of understanding that not all have the money to join in.
I know someone like that, he is on 60k per year, he gets a company car, his wife is self employed and "declaring" 20k per year. they paid their mortgage off 5 years ago, they have a caravan that they go to every second weekend, and go on at least 5 holidays abroad, not including all the stag doos and hen parties.
Some nights we are out for a few drinks, and they will moan the whole evening they are skint, and really struggling with bills, meanwhile i and a few others are trying to club together the money to get a taxi home as this was our first night out in months, that we saved up for ages for.
i think some people just get used to a lifestyle, and think they are hard up because they can only go on 4 holidays this year.
Im not jealous or anything, they earn their money they get fair and square, but it irks you when someone expects a sympathetic ear when they know their friends are struggling to keep food in the fridge, nevermind moaning because they cant go platinum this year with first choice.
Lol, I like the way this still plays on your mind almost 20 years later...
Their not a friend as such, its online radio and the manager is the one organizing it. I do it all from home hence the freeness of it and it gives me something to do, I just get the feeling they just think I can suddenly afford it when I cant barely scrap together enough for a night out once every month and even that is a struggle locally.
It was memorable because they wanted £10 per head for a takeaway Chinese. We struggle to spend that on one now!!!
I honestly think that they will not just realise your full situation.
If you can not go just tell them that you are financially strapped right now and wish them a good evening.
You never know they just might pay your train fare in recognition of your services supplied for free if they want you there bad enough
A mate of mine is currently unemployed and looking for work, if we're going out and he can't afford to come then we take it in turns to pay his way. It's what friends do.
Fancy being my mate? I've a parking ticket that needs paying.......;)