There really are some nasty selfish people about these days. You did absolutely the right thing in saying no. It is hard to believe that someone who has just moved in next door to you and you hardly know would be so rude as to ask you to keep lots of their stuff in your garage indefinately.
I am beginning to despair of people these days. The Christmas before last, my husband and myself realised that we would have to cut down on the presents we were sending out as there were more and more children coming along in the family. I wrote politely explain the position (bearing in mind that I am disabled and not able to work and my husband has now retired) and everyone understood and was quite alright about it.
All except for one cousin who thought it was an insult that I wasn't going to buy a present for her grandson anymore. I had the boy's mother (my cousin's daughter-in-law) ring me up and shout at me over the phone so much so that my son could hear what was going on in the next room. I wouldn't dream of shouting at someone for not buying a present. Then my cousin wrote and told me that she would not be in contact with me ever again. None of her other cousins had ever sent presents to her grandson, yet I have done so for nine years and get moaned at for giving up doing so, whilst she is still friends with the others who have never sent. Two months after this, at an Uncle's funeral, she completely blanked me while making a big point of coming over to everyone else and talking in a loud voice to them all. Sorry I have gone on for so long about this, but I just wanted to say how horrible people can be these days. So many people think only of themselves and if they don't get their own way, they act like little children having a paddy.
That's ridiculous. It sounds like there's something wrong with her.
There really are some nasty selfish people about these days. You did absolutely the right thing in saying no. It is hard to believe that someone who has just moved in next door to you and you hardly know would be so rude as to ask you to keep lots of their stuff in your garage indefinately.
I am beginning to despair of people these days. The Christmas before last, my husband and myself realised that we would have to cut down on the presents we were sending out as there were more and more children coming along in the family. I wrote politely explain the position (bearing in mind that I am disabled and not able to work and my husband has now retired) and everyone understood and was quite alright about it.
All except for one cousin who thought it was an insult that I wasn't going to buy a present for her grandson anymore. I had the boy's mother (my cousin's daughter-in-law) ring me up and shout at me over the phone so much so that my son could hear what was going on in the next room. I wouldn't dream of shouting at someone for not buying a present. Then my cousin wrote and told me that she would not be in contact with me ever again. None of her other cousins had ever sent presents to her grandson, yet I have done so for nine years and get moaned at for giving up doing so, whilst she is still friends with the others who have never sent. Two months after this, at an Uncle's funeral, she completely blanked me while making a big point of coming over to everyone else and talking in a loud voice to them all. Sorry I have gone on for so long about this, but I just wanted to say how horrible people can be these days. So many people think only of themselves and if they don't get their own way, they act like little children having a paddy.
Thank-you to Rose, Poppy and Big for your understanding. It is good to know that other people think she is strange. Another friend of mine asked if she was starting to get dementia as no one normal would act in that way.
Depressing reading, neighbours are to be discouraged than cultivated .
I always make a point of having a small dispute with my neighbours within days of moving in, bins, parking, noisy dogs , Etc. this way they refuse to speak to me from then on and in a stroke those awkward meetings [ will I say Hello or grudgingly stop for a forced cheery chat ? ] are a wearisome thing of the past .
Depressing reading, neighbours are to be discouraged than cultivated .
I always make a point of having a small dispute with my neighbours within days of moving in, bins, parking, noisy dogs , Etc. this way they refuse to speak to me from then on and in a stroke those awkward meetings [ will I say Hello or grudgingly stop for a forced cheery chat ? ] are a wearisome thing of the past .
Do you suggest putting your stuff in their garage then to kick things off?
They are totally and utterly in the wrong. Let's just hope they're renting rather than the home owners.
It's none of his business what you put in your garage. It could be totally empty and it would still be none of his business.
I had a ex who 'stored' some stuff in my garage. He told me it was winter clothes etc (he lived mainly in Mallorca). Turned out when my flat got raided by the police (because of his 'dodgy' dealings, which I knew nothing about), that he was actually storing all the bank details of his many bank accounts both here and in Spain.
I helped him out as I'm a decent human being who'd known him for many years, and yet he caused me grief and lied to me.
You have no reason to help your neighbours and they have no right to ask.
Sorry, long post - and this is going to sound like total "First World Problems" but I'd just be interested in what others thought about it.
We got new neighbours just before Christmas and up until recently, apart from introducing ourselves etc, hadn't really spoken to or seen them much except to exchange pleasantries if we saw them out in their garden or driveway or whatever. They are a young couple and seemed pleasant enough.
Last week, I was pottering about in my garage, sorting stuff out and just really tidying the place when the husband from next door came over. So, we spoke for a bit and I was asking how they're getting on in their new house etc.
He then started having a right nosey around the garage and saying "You guys have loads of space in here! This is MUCH bigger than ours" (it is a big garage but I wouldn't say it is "MUCH" bigger than theirs).
So, the next night when I came in from work my wife told me that he'd called round asking if he could store "a few things" in our garage as they "just don't have the room in theirs". My wife didn't really know what to say so she just told him to come back later and talk to me about it. Which he did. Along with the quip "Your wife said I had to talk you - I guess we know who makes the decisions in this house!" which I didn't quite care for.
Anyway, I asked him what it was he need to store, thinking that it was maybe one or two boxes of things (which I actually wouldn't have a problem with) but no - it was 3 big boxes full of wedding presents that they hadn't gotten round to do anything with, all their Christmas decorations including the tree and a small dining table and 4 chairs. Apparantly they're getting "a lovely new dining table from DFS but don't want to throw the other one away". So this stuff was to be stored in my garage indefinitely.
I told him no, that was far too much stuff and suggested he sell it or put it into proper storage. Then he said he would pay me to store it. As if I am going to start charging neighbours to store their stuff!
He started getting pretty ratty with me and had the cheek to say "You've got the space. What else are you going to be putting in there?" to which I replied that was none of his business and that his lack of space is not my problem.
I did feel quite bad for him as I know how stressful it is trying to get a new house sorted so I went round the next night with the details of a reliable and decently priced storage company that I have used in the past only it was the wife who answered the door. She snatched the piece of paper out of my hand and gave me a very sarcastic "thanks very much".
Now, whenever we see them out on their driveway they completely blank us. It's just total petty bullshit.
Also, yesterday my wife was talking to the woman 2 doors up (the new couple's other neighbour on the other side) and she told my wife that the woman had said to her that I went "ballistic" when her husband asked if they could keep some things in our garage. Apparently me saying "No that's too much stuff" equates to going ballistic
I was actually going to offer to keep some of the stuff for them eg the boxes of wedding presents but now I am thinking why the hell should I? Their behaviour over this has been ridiculous. Totally childish.
So, thoughts? Am I being unreasonable here?
In a nutshell no you are not being unreasonable and if I was you I'd give them a wide berth they don't sound very pleasant.
Thank-you to Rose, Poppy and Big for your understanding. It is good to know that other people think she is strange. Another friend of mine asked if she was starting to get dementia as no one normal would act in that way.
If that were the case then both the cousin and cousin's daughter-in-law would have to have started suffering as the cousin passed on the information, seemingly with bad will, and the cousin's dil actually shouted at you, which is not ok in any universe. How rude! Better that you've found out now than another 9 years down the line. They didn't phone to see if they could help you out financially, they phoned to tell you off for not spending your money on them- says all you need to know about them. Move on and ignore. And, I hope your other family members aren't facilitating the horrible behaviour by allowing you to be missed out of conversations and things, which is also rude. Have you told any of the family what has happened, and has anyone spoken in support of you?
I'd say no as well, the only exception would be family or friends but as you hardly know them they really aren't friends. I wouldn't dream of asking someone I hardly know to hold on to my stuff.
Tell them to remove their stuff forthwith and cut them out of your lives with immediate effect.
They have very quickly shown their true colours when things don’t go exactly as they would like; they will have no regard for you (or any other of your neighbours!) when they are not getting their own way.
Neighbours like that don’t usually change; leopards/spots and all that. You really don’t need to bother with them.
If that were the case then both the cousin and cousin's daughter-in-law would have to have started suffering as the cousin passed on the information, seemingly with bad will, and the cousin's dil actually shouted at you, which is not ok in any universe. How rude! Better that you've found out now than another 9 years down the line. They didn't phone to see if they could help you out financially, they phoned to tell you off for not spending your money on them- says all you need to know about them. Move on and ignore. And, I hope your other family members aren't facilitating the horrible behaviour by allowing you to be missed out of conversations and things, which is also rude. Have you told any of the family what has happened, and has anyone spoken in support of you?
You are right in all you say. I have told other cousins about it and without exception they are all disgusted about it. The daughter of one of my cousins got married last year and we were invited to the wedding but not the cousin I have been talking about.
As far as I know none of them sent her a Christmas card last Christmas either. They didn't actually speak to her about it, but I wouldn't expect them to do that. The good thing is though, that my cousin's daughter is still in contact with us and came to visit us recently and we had a lovely afternoon and evening together and didn't speak about her mum which I felt was the best way forward.
I've had a spat with a neighbour who wanted to be king of the neighbourhood but we just wanted to live and let live rather than be in each other's pockets. Long story short he ended up doing couple of mean things, I had to get council involved, it stopped. But on one occasion not long after we moved in he helped another neighbour take down an old shed. He knew I had a log burner and thought he'd get rid of it on me. He left it at the back of another neighbour's house adjoining my garden, then knocked on my door and said 'come with me' as he led me down my garden path which annoyed me as I'm thinking to myself 'this is my house, why are you guiding me around my home?'
I was still smiles and polite, he said 'it's your birthday' pointing at the shed. I said thanks but no thanks, it's treated wood, it's too much, I don't want it. He then had a slight at me insinuating it's me who has a problem for not wanting the old shed and causing the neighbour a problem who'll now need to get a skip! Unbelievable.
They sound really forward for approaching you and not even getting to know you first- only just moved in, FGS. You've probably done yourselves a favour because people like this are often 'users'. They start with one request and then comes another and another and another. If you give in and say 'yes', they will constantly 'up the ante'- borrowing tools that don't get returned on time or in good condition, expecting you to look after the cat/ dog every time they go away, right up to asking for 'small loans', etc. They usually give very little back and are quick to fall out if things don't go their way. Perhaps the confrontation wasn't pleasant but if they know you're not a pushover from the start, they're less likely to want to 'use' you in the future. Believe me, I speak from experience.
I've had a spat with a neighbour who wanted to be king of the neighbourhood but we just wanted to live and let live rather than be in each other's pockets. Long story short he ended up doing couple of mean things, I had to get council involved, it stopped. But on one occasion not long after we moved in he helped another neighbour take down an old shed. He knew I had a log burner and thought he'd get rid of it on me. He left it at the back of another neighbour's house adjoining my garden, then knocked on my door and said 'come with me' as he led me down my garden path which annoyed me as I'm thinking to myself 'this is my house, why are you guiding me around my home?'
I was still smiles and polite, he said 'it's your birthday' pointing at the shed. I said thanks but no thanks, it's treated wood, it's too much, I don't want it. He then had a slight at me insinuating it's me who has a problem for not wanting the old shed and causing the neighbour a problem who'll now need to get a skip! Unbelievable.
The 'come with me' people. Ugh!
I've got a neighbour who's been trying to get past our front door for the last year. I've managed to keep her at arms length with cool politeness so far. I just know she's going to be trouble at some point.
The last thing you want is being charged with receiving stolen goods. What are they up to in their own garage that they can't fit a table and a few boxes in any way?
I had a problem with my neighbour , who asked if they could put a cat box in my back garden, as they didnt have room. I reluctantly agreed , but next thing I knew , a kennel sized contraption was in my back yard , and my garden was full of their cats (they had 8 cats at the time) , and they had somehow even converted my compost bin into a place for one of their cats to sleep. Next , they started dumping their rubbish in my back garden , promising to get it taken to the dump but never getting around to doing so . Problems got so bad and my back garden was so smelly with cats and rubbish , I went to the council and environmental health .When questioned by them , my neighbour pled ignorance saying all the rubbish was mine and all the cats were mine , despite me not having any. Eventually they owned up , and the council found cat boxes hiden on my property that I didn't know about (under bushes and stuff) . My neighbour hot a warning. Six months later they tried it again with me , and I told her to swivel. I've learnt my lesson.
Comments
That's ridiculous. It sounds like there's something wrong with her.
You don't need these ugly people in your life.
Blank me once, their fault
Blank me twice, my fault
No one gets the chance to blank me twice
Just say No!
I always make a point of having a small dispute with my neighbours within days of moving in, bins, parking, noisy dogs , Etc. this way they refuse to speak to me from then on and in a stroke those awkward meetings [ will I say Hello or grudgingly stop for a forced cheery chat ? ] are a wearisome thing of the past .
Do you suggest putting your stuff in their garage then to kick things off?
It's none of his business what you put in your garage. It could be totally empty and it would still be none of his business.
I had a ex who 'stored' some stuff in my garage. He told me it was winter clothes etc (he lived mainly in Mallorca). Turned out when my flat got raided by the police (because of his 'dodgy' dealings, which I knew nothing about), that he was actually storing all the bank details of his many bank accounts both here and in Spain.
I helped him out as I'm a decent human being who'd known him for many years, and yet he caused me grief and lied to me.
You have no reason to help your neighbours and they have no right to ask.
Stand firm and sod them!
It happens! See my previous post!
In a nutshell no you are not being unreasonable and if I was you I'd give them a wide berth they don't sound very pleasant.
If that were the case then both the cousin and cousin's daughter-in-law would have to have started suffering as the cousin passed on the information, seemingly with bad will, and the cousin's dil actually shouted at you, which is not ok in any universe. How rude! Better that you've found out now than another 9 years down the line. They didn't phone to see if they could help you out financially, they phoned to tell you off for not spending your money on them- says all you need to know about them. Move on and ignore. And, I hope your other family members aren't facilitating the horrible behaviour by allowing you to be missed out of conversations and things, which is also rude. Have you told any of the family what has happened, and has anyone spoken in support of you?
The wedding presents would eventually get moved, but the table and chairs would fester for a VERY long time.
Nope, you did right. The fact they're blanking you is the best result. You're better off without them.
They have very quickly shown their true colours when things don’t go exactly as they would like; they will have no regard for you (or any other of your neighbours!) when they are not getting their own way.
Neighbours like that don’t usually change; leopards/spots and all that. You really don’t need to bother with them.
You are right in all you say. I have told other cousins about it and without exception they are all disgusted about it. The daughter of one of my cousins got married last year and we were invited to the wedding but not the cousin I have been talking about.
As far as I know none of them sent her a Christmas card last Christmas either. They didn't actually speak to her about it, but I wouldn't expect them to do that. The good thing is though, that my cousin's daughter is still in contact with us and came to visit us recently and we had a lovely afternoon and evening together and didn't speak about her mum which I felt was the best way forward.
Off to read the rest of the thread now; hope you've not changed your mind since. ;-)
I was still smiles and polite, he said 'it's your birthday' pointing at the shed. I said thanks but no thanks, it's treated wood, it's too much, I don't want it. He then had a slight at me insinuating it's me who has a problem for not wanting the old shed and causing the neighbour a problem who'll now need to get a skip! Unbelievable.
^^^^^ good advice
The 'come with me' people. Ugh!
I've got a neighbour who's been trying to get past our front door for the last year. I've managed to keep her at arms length with cool politeness so far. I just know she's going to be trouble at some point.
Also, it's good to read that I'm not the only one with cheeky, forward neighbours!