Family want to go out for a meal sometime next week, I'm torn on whether to go or not
I haven't seen family for weeks and we don't go out a lot which is why part of me wants to go
The other part is feeling like shit, aching to bits, can't bring myself to look in the mirror, feeling ugly and unwanted by the OH, got a massive rash on my stomach which has scabbed up and I'm trying to avoid getting it wet, also trying to avoid the OH seeing it as it's ugly and will turn him off more
I'm not expecting anyone to answer, feels good to get it out
Ask somebody IRL that you know about this, not some randoms on DS. After all, we don't know your personal circumstances really, do we.
And that is possibly part of the problem - being in the company of just one person for 24 hours per day seven days a week is possibly not the most healthy way of existing. A little bit of variety might be the spice of life!
Have you explored any local support groups for eds? If there aren't any near you, maybe you could investigate starting one? You were looking for things to do a couple of weeks ago....
Rereading this it sounds a lot like me before i knew i had depression. I was forever trying to justify not doing things and looking for people to back me up.
We would be going out and i was looking forward to it but then i would go through a bad patch and be looking for any small thing that meant i had an excuse not to go. Eg i would see that there was a 5% chance of heavy rain and that would be enough reason for me not to go out. Other times i would have a headache or something minor that in the past inwould just take a tablet and get on with it, but now that would be a reason for me to stay in bed.
If my husband asked if we wanted to visit my parents i would come up with all sorts, silly things like theres motorsport on tv so they will want to watch that instead of have us round! Anything to get out of leaving my comfort zone.
Today is a really nice day and we had planned a day out. All week ive been umming and ahhing about whether to go or not. In my head ive had loads of reasoning about why i should stay home (only day off, want to relax, 6am start tomorrow and so on) but i need to make myself go. This will be the first time in two months ive left the house to go out somewhere for fun (im not counting work as leaving the house!). So im making myself go!
Ebony i get where youre coming from and it does look like you are looking for valid reasons not to go, but sometimes you just have to make yourself. You dont work so whats the harm going out for a meal? If you have fun then great, if you dont then so what? You would only be sitting at home anyway and you have the rest of your life to do that. Its not like you only have one day off a week and they are expecting you to go out with them is it?
And that is possibly part of the problem - being in the company of just one person for 24 hours per day seven days a week is possibly not the most healthy way of existing. A little bit of variety might be the spice of life!
Have you explored any local support groups for eds? If there aren't any near you, maybe you could investigate starting one? You were looking for things to do a couple of weeks ago....
Wouldn't mind starting my own group, can set my own rules that way
Rereading this it sounds a lot like me before i knew i had depression. I was forever trying to justify not doing things and looking for people to back me up.
We would be going out and i was looking forward to it but then i would go through a bad patch and be looking for any small thing that meant i had an excuse not to go. Eg i would see that there was a 5% chance of heavy rain and that would be enough reason for me not to go out. Other times i would have a headache or something minor that in the past inwould just take a tablet and get on with it, but now that would be a reason for me to stay in bed.
If my husband asked if we wanted to visit my parents i would come up with all sorts, silly things like theres motorsport on tv so they will want to watch that instead of have us round! Anything to get out of leaving my comfort zone.
Today is a really nice day and we had planned a day out. All week ive been umming and ahhing about whether to go or not. In my head ive had loads of reasoning about why i should stay home (only day off, want to relax, 6am start tomorrow and so on) but i need to make myself go. This will be the first time in two months ive left the house to go out somewhere for fun (im not counting work as leaving the house!). So im making myself go!
Ebony i get where youre coming from and it does look like you are looking for valid reasons not to go, but sometimes you just have to make yourself. You dont work so whats the harm going out for a meal? If you have fun then great, if you dont then so what? You would only be sitting at home anyway and you have the rest of your life to do that. Its not like you only have one day off a week and they are expecting you to go out with them is it?
Family want to go out for a meal sometime next week, I'm torn on whether to go or not
I haven't seen family for weeks and we don't go out a lot which is why part of me wants to go
The other part is feeling like shit, aching to bits, can't bring myself to look in the mirror, feeling ugly and unwanted by the OH, got a massive rash on my stomach which has scabbed up and I'm trying to avoid getting it wet, also trying to avoid the OH seeing it as it's ugly and will turn him off more
I'm not expecting anyone to answer, feels good to get it out
Posting a thread about your indecisiveness about going out for a meal is either ;
A, attention seeking
B, a serious mental problem that needs to be addressed
Family want to go out for a meal sometime next week, I'm torn on whether to go or not
I haven't seen family for weeks and we don't go out a lot which is why part of me wants to go
The other part is feeling like shit, aching to bits, can't bring myself to look in the mirror, feeling ugly and unwanted by the OH, got a massive rash on my stomach which has scabbed up and I'm trying to avoid getting it wet, also trying to avoid the OH seeing it as it's ugly and will turn him off more
I'm not expecting anyone to answer, feels good to get it out
A scar that will eventually fade (or not even) is not ugly. The attitude of finding it ugly on a partner is ugly. There is no wrong answer. Did use if you want to go , then stock to it and don't feel bad either way. Take care
Why would your oh who youre not romantically intimate with anyway find a scar offputting when you never do anything anyway? Just sounds like another reason not to go out
Why would your oh who youre not romantically intimate with anyway find a scar offputting when you never do anything anyway? Just sounds like another reason not to go out
Have you contacted your Gp yet about your MH consultation?
As for your OH not wanting to look at your tummy good job hes not my OH, my hubby of 30 yrs has had to see me in some awful states over the years do to mutliple illness and health problems, but we are in this together so its not a problem for him, the saying in sickness and in health comes to mind.
Life is too short i can assure you, so get on and live it to the full !
Have you contacted your Gp yet about your MH consultation?
As for your OH not wanting to look at your tummy good job hes not my OH, my hubby of 30 yrs has had to see me in some awful states over the years do to mutliple illness and health problems, but we are in this together so its not a problem for him, the saying in sickness and in health comes to mind.
Life is too short i can assure you, so get on and live it to the full !
It's not about him not wanting to see it, it's about me not wanting to show it, will just have to try and hide it as best I can when we shower
Comments
Ask somebody IRL that you know about this, not some randoms on DS. After all, we don't know your personal circumstances really, do we.
There's only the family going out with us to ask
And that is possibly part of the problem - being in the company of just one person for 24 hours per day seven days a week is possibly not the most healthy way of existing. A little bit of variety might be the spice of life!
Have you explored any local support groups for eds? If there aren't any near you, maybe you could investigate starting one? You were looking for things to do a couple of weeks ago....
We would be going out and i was looking forward to it but then i would go through a bad patch and be looking for any small thing that meant i had an excuse not to go. Eg i would see that there was a 5% chance of heavy rain and that would be enough reason for me not to go out. Other times i would have a headache or something minor that in the past inwould just take a tablet and get on with it, but now that would be a reason for me to stay in bed.
If my husband asked if we wanted to visit my parents i would come up with all sorts, silly things like theres motorsport on tv so they will want to watch that instead of have us round! Anything to get out of leaving my comfort zone.
Today is a really nice day and we had planned a day out. All week ive been umming and ahhing about whether to go or not. In my head ive had loads of reasoning about why i should stay home (only day off, want to relax, 6am start tomorrow and so on) but i need to make myself go. This will be the first time in two months ive left the house to go out somewhere for fun (im not counting work as leaving the house!). So im making myself go!
Ebony i get where youre coming from and it does look like you are looking for valid reasons not to go, but sometimes you just have to make yourself. You dont work so whats the harm going out for a meal? If you have fun then great, if you dont then so what? You would only be sitting at home anyway and you have the rest of your life to do that. Its not like you only have one day off a week and they are expecting you to go out with them is it?
Wouldn't mind starting my own group, can set my own rules that way
Up to now we are going
Btw we do work, from home
Posting a thread about your indecisiveness about going out for a meal is either ;
A, attention seeking
B, a serious mental problem that needs to be addressed
C, both of the above.
D, none of the above
E, your some kind of masochist who enjoys the vicarious pleasure of being ridiculed on a daily basis ?
Still D
be nice people
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VV1XWJN3nJo
My intention was never to be unpleasant. Just trying to understand why a poster allows herself to be belittled and ridiculed . Will leave it there .
i know that..
the DS legend that is tinktinktinkerbell
It's still not been done!
A scar that will eventually fade (or not even) is not ugly. The attitude of finding it ugly on a partner is ugly. There is no wrong answer. Did use if you want to go , then stock to it and don't feel bad either way. Take care
We got a letter asking us to call them to arrange for it to be done
OH rang countless times, answer phone full :-/
He's going to ring the council on weds
Do you never ring them?
Who said anything about a scar
No
Have you contacted your Gp yet about your MH consultation?
As for your OH not wanting to look at your tummy good job hes not my OH, my hubby of 30 yrs has had to see me in some awful states over the years do to mutliple illness and health problems, but we are in this together so its not a problem for him, the saying in sickness and in health comes to mind.
Life is too short i can assure you, so get on and live it to the full !
I'd have thought it more interesting trying to understand why some posters in this thread feel the need to belittle mock and sneer.
Perhaps that's just me.
It seems to be a two way street.
It's not about him not wanting to see it, it's about me not wanting to show it, will just have to try and hide it as best I can when we shower
I've belittled, mocked and sneered on this topic?