You live in the West - where your 'allowed' to self improve - and you were fortunate enough to meet the right people who helped you along. Many people have no such luck
For those in war torn countries and real poverty, there's virtually no way out right now.
There won't be snow in Africa this Christmas time. The greatest gift they'll get this year is life.
Apart from my own drive and determination, who do you think helped me along then as that seems to be the escape route for people in a rut? I'm genuinely interested as you seem to know a lot more about it than myself.
There is no such thing as luck - we deal the cards which we are given as best we can. Nothing in my life has been a result of luck since the day I was born, mainly as virtually everyone was 'luckier' than me the minute I was conceived.
I don't know...new year, new start. It's the perfect time to make some much needed changes in a person's life.
It is just another day for me and another year.
It has no significant meaning to me.
I often hear people say they will start something new in the new year, Mondays are used as a significant day as well to start something.
If it is my mind to start something I start there and then if possible.
I do understand why it is a significant time for others though and reading some posts on here has made sad reading.
My sister gets very maudling around New Years day and it continues for quite sometime as she is not in a relationship but wants to be in one, as much as we try to help her get cheery she still gets depressed.
I know how you feel, OP. I'm not a fan of New Year's Eve either, we usually have a house party but I think that I'd rather be alone. I always spend a little bit of time on my own on NYE.
For me New Years is a celebration of making it through the trials & tribulations the year has thrown at me... And its about hope that things will be a bit easier so I won't have to work as hard to be happy in the next year.
Really enjoyed reading this post. Thank you for sharing
I've struggled with social anxiety all my life too, to the point where I find it incredibly difficult to even leave the house (it's been over 3 months since I last set foot outside ) so I can really relate to your post. I, too, hide away from any visitors to the house (even my own brother and his girlfriend when they come over) but I managed to go downstairs and eat Christmas dinner with my parents and uncle this year. -high fives self!-
I always find New Year's Eve so depressing because for the past 6 years, I've spent it sitting alone in my room thinking that I've wasted another year and nothing's changed. I'm still living at home at the age of 25 (26 on the 20th of January) I have no friends, no job, and I honestly don't think I'll ever be mentally or financially stable enough to ever move into my own home.
Still, your post gave me a little bit of hope that perhaps things may gradually improve if I try hard enough
If you try hard enough, anything can happen, and as you showed by eating Christmas dinner with your parents and uncle, so maybe you could try just staying downstairs even for half an hour when your brother comes round next.
Around 2003 I ended up in a psychiatric hospital where my social anxiety and mild agoraphobia got worse, but when I finished my last group session of the day I would go back to my room, and force myself to go for a little walk, and as soon as I stepped in the room, I put my shoes on, and went out, without letting myself talk my way out of it, maybe you could just start by walking around your garden if you have one)
Fast forward to now, and even though I don't go out as much as I should (really due to laziness now though :cool: )I have been on some lovely day trips this year by myself, and feel optimistic for this year.
I think it's hard if someone has been bereaved in the past year. They are stepping into a new year and the person they have lost is being left behind in the old year, do you know what I mean?
I feel the exact same and I'm so glad I'm not the only one. The new year is always a sad reflective time for me, nothing to celebrate at all. I just go over everything that happened that year and wonder did I make the most of it etc, a year passing is another year as stripped of youth and one more year closer to being old and that depresses me.
I love it when the new year arrives. I can get back to eating much more healthily, I know that the best season will be arriving in a couple of months and it is starting to get lighter every day, plus fingers crossed there will be less idiots chasing for work to be done at light speed just because they're taking time off for a religious holiday when they don't even go to church.
Its not about money at all. Some of the happiest people I know don't have a pot to piss in.
Totally! I don't have money but I do count my blessings. I'm in love, have two lovely and healthy girls, a roof over my head and a soft bed to sleep in.
OP you could just as easily say that about every single day when you wake up..... yesterday has gone and you'll never get it back, indeed the minute I took to write this has gone and I'll never get it back. The secret is to enjoy what you do have and appreciate every day you are given. Live for NOW for now is all we have.
I don't know if any of you have heard of or read/watched any material from Dr Wayne Dyer? Dr Dyer talks about the Ego, the ego is the part of us that is always wanting, always comparing ourselves to others, If we lead our lives following the ego we can never be happy because the ego is always wanting, we have to learn to live from our true self because if you're living from the ego OK you might have the job, the money, the material possessions and yes it might make you happy for a while but it will not satisfy the ego it will want more. We can only be happy living from the true self.
I find the hype depressing, most certainly. I had to turn the telly off earlier because everyone was acting like New Year was some shiny new thing they'd never experienced before. The hype seems worse this year than I can remember it being in a while. I am longing for the next few weeks to be over with. People don't tend to shut up about it and their bloody resolutions until at least mid-January.
My husband always works for New Year. Eve,Day and 2nd and I'm always here by myself as kids are grown up. I always see the new year as another day. What annoys me most is people always asking if you are going to have a wee drink to see in the new year (being scottish and in Scotland it's a law somehow) and I always say no and they look at you funny. I'm not going to tell them that my epilepsy and alcohol doesn't mix as they always go "you can have a wee one on the fly" and I always want to say "will you take me to hospital if I don't come out of my fit" sometimes I'm just too polite
I find myself very depressed on New Year's Day usually, because I'm coming down from nearly two weeks of seeing people I love and being where I want to be all the time, and a month of good will and good wishes.
Then boom - back into the daily grind. My career is going well, and I enjoy a lot of my job. I live with my boyfriend whom I love. However, my best friends live far away, I live in Birmingham rather than the beautiful place I grew up in, I don't have the time to do enough of the good stuff, and I work with some really annoying people too.
I feel like for my career I should stay in this job at least another year (optimally two), but the thought of coming back to this desk for another two years just feels a bit tragic right now.
I hate new year. It is overrated. Why see in a year that is going to kick you in the teeth at some point. Years passing is one step closer to when all who are posting on ds will no longer be around.
Comments
There won't be snow in Africa this Christmas time. The greatest gift they'll get this year is life.
Apart from my own drive and determination, who do you think helped me along then as that seems to be the escape route for people in a rut? I'm genuinely interested as you seem to know a lot more about it than myself.
There is no such thing as luck - we deal the cards which we are given as best we can. Nothing in my life has been a result of luck since the day I was born, mainly as virtually everyone was 'luckier' than me the minute I was conceived.
A Floyd lyric
It is just another day for me and another year.
It has no significant meaning to me.
I often hear people say they will start something new in the new year, Mondays are used as a significant day as well to start something.
If it is my mind to start something I start there and then if possible.
I do understand why it is a significant time for others though and reading some posts on here has made sad reading.
My sister gets very maudling around New Years day and it continues for quite sometime as she is not in a relationship but wants to be in one, as much as we try to help her get cheery she still gets depressed.
If you try hard enough, anything can happen, and as you showed by eating Christmas dinner with your parents and uncle, so maybe you could try just staying downstairs even for half an hour when your brother comes round next.
Around 2003 I ended up in a psychiatric hospital where my social anxiety and mild agoraphobia got worse, but when I finished my last group session of the day I would go back to my room, and force myself to go for a little walk, and as soon as I stepped in the room, I put my shoes on, and went out, without letting myself talk my way out of it, maybe you could just start by walking around your garden if you have one)
Fast forward to now, and even though I don't go out as much as I should (really due to laziness now though :cool: )I have been on some lovely day trips this year by myself, and feel optimistic for this year.
If you ever want to chat, pm me
Totally! I don't have money but I do count my blessings. I'm in love, have two lovely and healthy girls, a roof over my head and a soft bed to sleep in.
OP you could just as easily say that about every single day when you wake up..... yesterday has gone and you'll never get it back, indeed the minute I took to write this has gone and I'll never get it back. The secret is to enjoy what you do have and appreciate every day you are given. Live for NOW for now is all we have.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kg4eE4Asim8
What are you going to do with the rest of your life?
You married?
Got kids?
House?
Car?
Go on holiday every year?
Are you Happy?
Then boom - back into the daily grind. My career is going well, and I enjoy a lot of my job. I live with my boyfriend whom I love. However, my best friends live far away, I live in Birmingham rather than the beautiful place I grew up in, I don't have the time to do enough of the good stuff, and I work with some really annoying people too.
I feel like for my career I should stay in this job at least another year (optimally two), but the thought of coming back to this desk for another two years just feels a bit tragic right now.