I had some rough times at school, but the worst bully in my life was the local policeman who seemed to be never off my back and harassed me for over 3 years, my young teenage life was fukcing hell with him.
Anyway, One night at a local disco he humiliated me in front of others with accusations of goings on locally that I had nothing to do with, as he was speaking to me I stared him out and hoped someone would murder him, you know what, it happened the following year and I felt so relieved.
I had some rough times at school, but the worst bully in my life was the local policeman who seemed to be never off my back and harassed me for over 3 years, my young teenage life was fukcing hell with him.
Anyway, One night at a local disco he humiliated me in front of others with accusations of goings on locally that I had nothing to do with, as he was speaking to me I stared him out and hoped someone would murder him, you know what, it happened the following year and I felt so relieved.
It doesn't make it not sad that a teenage girl hanged herself. She must have been dealing with some pretty awful stuff in her life, as are a lot (not all) bullies.
I had some rough times at school, but the worst bully in my life was the local policeman who seemed to be never off my back and harassed me for over 3 years, my young teenage life was fukcing hell with him.
Anyway, One night at a local disco he humiliated me in front of others with accusations of goings on locally that I had nothing to do with, as he was speaking to me I stared him out and hoped someone would murder him, you know what, it happened the following year and I felt so relieved.
Exactly. Just like the apparent victims of school bullies who claim to have changed into stronger and more beautiful looking people as they have aged, so then many people who were obnoxious kids and bullies at school have changed for the better as they have matured as well. People just aren't the same as adults as they were at 13 and 14 for the most part.
We had a reunion at our school recently to celebrate the school's 50th year, and it was good to see a lot of people. Many of the cooler kids are in rubbish jobs, many of the wallflowers and nerdy kids have blossomed into good-looking extroverts, one of the smallest, swotty kids was now a 6 foot odd bodybuilder who works the doors of a nightclub. It's life. One person in my class reminded me that I actually never spoke to them in all the time we were at school together, and I kind of regret that looking back. People need to let it go.
That's so true. School is such a short time in your life and takes place in a very atypical environment. Often people who thought they were cock of the walk at school get a short sharp shock when they move into an adult environment and realise that no one is impressed with their showing off, bitchiness and general swaggering around. Sometimes they cop on and start to behave like a decent member of society and look back with embarrassment at the way they behaved when they were younger. Other people, who never felt they fitted in to the narrow parameters of school life, blossom and thrive when they go out into the wider world and become much more confident and outgoing.
I don't know if any of you ever saw that film 'Death of a Cheerleader' which is very closely based on a real life event in America in the 1980s. But I always felt very sorry for the perpetrators real life parents who not only lost their daughter at a tragically young age, but then had to see her immortalised forever on screen as a nasty, spiteful little bully. No one really knows how that fifteen year old would have turned out if she had lived. Yes, she may have gone on to be a workplace bully or a bitchy woman who thought she was better than everyone else. But she may also have matured and changed when she left school and no longer had the illusion of 'popularity' because people were afraid to stand up to her and might have become a perfectly nice person and a decent member of society.
You really can't assume that because you knew someone for a few years when they were going through all the ups and downs of adolescence that they are now the same person twenty or thirty years later.
Yes I think it's sad too when young person takes their own life...
I wonder how much bullying is actually down to jealousy given that an awful lot of them seem to come from pretty awful homes.
Sometimes but then they also pick on the kids who seem to come from worse than them sometimes it maybe they have to do that to make themselves feel better.
That's so true. School is such a short time in your life and takes place in a very atypical environment.
I imagine prison being very much the same. A load of people thrown in the mix together in a place none of them want to be at particularly, and where there is no other opportunity to rise up above the rest for some other than to push the weaker elements down. Once out in the wider world, those people are nothing special anymore.
It is slightly troubling to read people taking delight in other people's suffering however many years later. Most people are arseholes and everyone makes mistakes when they are young, including all those people who claimed to be the victims. Just move on and forget it, and this is from someone who was bullied at school, before anyone throws that one at me.
In my experience the majority of kids who were total knobheads at school are still total morons as adults. Not all of them as some have matured but I'd say out of our year group, the majority of the ones who acted like total idiots are still total idiots now. They either went on to make nothing of themselves ending up in dead end jobs or permanently on the dole or ended up in trouble with the police or on drugs etc.
I went to a couple of school reunions in the past 10 years and I found this to certainly be the case. I can't speak for everyone but the majority of lads who were idiots and all full of themselves are still like that now albeit a few who settled down and grew up and turned out alright.
Well when I added them it was 15 years after the events so did did wonder how they had turned out plus I don't want to hold that grudge forever.
Now I have added some of them but admit I have never really spoken to them on FB some not at all.
This is one of the things that used to drive me nuts about some people on Facebook. Why ask if you can be someone's friend and then never bother to speak to them? Friend collectors used to do my head in. I remember when I was on FB I used to have a purge of people every few months who wanted me to add them as a friend but then never bothered to say two words to me thereafter.
One person which I deleted who I never had anything to do with at school who never said a word to me on Facebook tried to add me again 3 times. What for? He had no intentions of actually speaking to me.
It's like asking someone for their phone number if you've got no intentions of calling them. What's the point?
This is one of the things that used to drive me nuts about some people on Facebook. Why ask if you can be someone's friend and then never bother to speak to them? Friend collectors used to do my head in. I remember when I was on FB I used to have a purge of people every few months who wanted me to add them as a friend but then never bothered to say two words to me thereafter.
One person which I deleted who I never had anything to do with at school who never said a word to me on Facebook tried to add me again 3 times. What for? He had no intentions of actually speaking to me.
It's like asking someone for their phone number if you've got no intentions of calling them. What's the point?
They asked to add me I just accepted
I'm hardly a freind collector everybody on my FB I know in real life.
In my experience the majority of kids who were total knobheads at school are still total morons as adults. Not all of them as some have matured but I'd say out of our year group, the majority of the ones who acted like total idiots are still total idiots now. They either went on to make nothing of themselves ending up in dead end jobs or permanently on the dole or ended up in trouble with the police or on drugs etc.
I went to a couple of school reunions in the past 10 years and I found this to certainly be the case. I can't speak for everyone but the majority of lads who were idiots and all full of themselves are still like that now albeit a few who settled down and grew up and turned out alright.
I'm not really sure that's always true, especially the more time that gets put between when you left school. I know I'm a completely different person to who I was when I left 15 odd years ago, but people don't really grow up during their early 20s that much.
I'm hardly a freind collector everybody on my FB I know in real life.
I know loads of people which I don't actually speak to as friends. Like the woman who works in our local newsagent. Doesn't mean I would add them as a friend. You said so yourself that you haven't spoken to most of them and some not at all. So why bother adding someone you have no contact with? It's like asking someone for their phone number who you have no intentions of calling just so you can appear to have a few pretend "friends" in your contact list when in reality they're not friends at all, just people you once happened to know.
TBH I find the word 'Friends' seems to be used very loosely these days almost to describe anyone with which you've had the slightest contact with. It annoys me when I hear housemates on Big Brother talk about which other housemates they're friends with or they'll have an argument and say, 'I thought you were my friend'. You've only known one another 5 minutes. How can they be your friend?
What I find interesting is how bullying victims actually KNOW what became of their tormentors. I mean, did you add them on Facebook, or was it sheer coincidence that you read about them / heard about them from word-of-mouth?
Since I was released from serving time in school, I have no idea what happened to any of my ex-bullies and I have no wish to know. Like everyone that I come to despise, they cease to exist.
I did my high schooling in Western Australia, and left that s*** hole of a school 42 years ago - John Forrest High 1969 - 1971.
I was never bullied as such as I on day one identified who to keep well away from, so I avoided them and their little gangs like the plague over the three years I was there. Two boys I recall were Wayne Duforce and Kevin Frome who he who used to knock around with. All the boys I used to associate with kept away from them two and their little gang as well.
Both were a couple of p****'s who thought they were tough, with Duforce being suspended twice IIRC. Neither of them will have made anything of their life as both always used to be in the basic level classes, and they never did progress beyond that. I can vaguely mentally picture Duforce all dressed in grey and black, with a studded belt, and the two of them used to smoke and drink alcohol.
The ONLY time I EVER associated with Duforce was outside the changing rooms on a large grass patch, when all the boys were arm wrestling each other, and I was put with him. I was beating him when he suddenly chickened out.
As for where are they both now, I have no idea, and don't care what happened to them either. I wouldn't be surprised if Duforce did time or is dead and buried/burned. I suppose out of curiosity I could do a police record search, but as its a paid for service I'm not going to bother.
BTW there are a couple of videos of my old school on You Tube, still looks familiar in parts, and it hasn't changed that much.
One of them has got married, got a good job and has a very nice life as far as I'm aware.
The other one also has a good job in London and probably gets paid buckets, has a nice steady girlfriend and has done charitable works in Africa such as building a school. He has a photo of his arms around smiling African orphans as the cover photo on his facebook page that nearly made me vomit and was clearly put on there to show the world what a caring hero he is (or maybe that's just my cynical interpretation of it ). Apparently, he's now moving to Australia. I was always scared of bumping into him so that's something I don't have to worry about any more.
Both of these people bullied me verbally and emotionally rather than physically and they were in the top sets at school so I wasn't expecting them to have turned into thugs who are in prison.
one of our notorious bully's that made my life hell was called ian ,,,,,,, he often took money off me and punched me in the mouth a few times , him and his equally sadistic mates rulled the school with an iron fist,,,,,,,,,, at the time , school was sheer terror for me ,,,,,, my stomach churned at the thought of having to go there each day ,,,, and i often skived off as a result.
i was the original glasses wearing computer nerd.
anyhow ,,,,,,,, a few years ago , i heard through the grapevine that ian and his girlfriend had a pissed up row on their hotel room balcony in spain which resulted in ian going over it , plummeting to the ground ,,,,,,, apparently the accident has left him wheelchair bound for the rest of his life.
so my feelings ? ,,,,,,,,,,,,, well i honestly wouldn't wish that fate upon anyone ,,,,,,,,,, and i would still wish him all the best in life. despite the constant misery he put me through.
but if the gods/spirits/fate/circumstance/karma etc decree that these accidents must happen to folk , ,,,,, then i guess i would sooner hope it happens to bully's ,,,,,, than people who have never hurt nobody through life
ya know what i mean ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, i wish his tragic accident never happened ,,,,,,,,,, but like others have said ,,,,,, karma is a bitch
Comments
Ha ha. Innit?
Anyway, One night at a local disco he humiliated me in front of others with accusations of goings on locally that I had nothing to do with, as he was speaking to me I stared him out and hoped someone would murder him, you know what, it happened the following year and I felt so relieved.
Are you "Carrie" or something?
Damien:D
It doesn't make it not sad that a teenage girl hanged herself. She must have been dealing with some pretty awful stuff in her life, as are a lot (not all) bullies.
Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.
Indeed..
That's so true. School is such a short time in your life and takes place in a very atypical environment. Often people who thought they were cock of the walk at school get a short sharp shock when they move into an adult environment and realise that no one is impressed with their showing off, bitchiness and general swaggering around. Sometimes they cop on and start to behave like a decent member of society and look back with embarrassment at the way they behaved when they were younger. Other people, who never felt they fitted in to the narrow parameters of school life, blossom and thrive when they go out into the wider world and become much more confident and outgoing.
I don't know if any of you ever saw that film 'Death of a Cheerleader' which is very closely based on a real life event in America in the 1980s. But I always felt very sorry for the perpetrators real life parents who not only lost their daughter at a tragically young age, but then had to see her immortalised forever on screen as a nasty, spiteful little bully. No one really knows how that fifteen year old would have turned out if she had lived. Yes, she may have gone on to be a workplace bully or a bitchy woman who thought she was better than everyone else. But she may also have matured and changed when she left school and no longer had the illusion of 'popularity' because people were afraid to stand up to her and might have become a perfectly nice person and a decent member of society.
You really can't assume that because you knew someone for a few years when they were going through all the ups and downs of adolescence that they are now the same person twenty or thirty years later.
Dont think I ever have. She didnt bully me personally but she was a big bully
I wonder how much bullying is actually down to jealousy given that an awful lot of them seem to come from pretty awful homes.
Sometimes but then they also pick on the kids who seem to come from worse than them sometimes it maybe they have to do that to make themselves feel better.
I imagine prison being very much the same. A load of people thrown in the mix together in a place none of them want to be at particularly, and where there is no other opportunity to rise up above the rest for some other than to push the weaker elements down. Once out in the wider world, those people are nothing special anymore.
In my experience the majority of kids who were total knobheads at school are still total morons as adults. Not all of them as some have matured but I'd say out of our year group, the majority of the ones who acted like total idiots are still total idiots now. They either went on to make nothing of themselves ending up in dead end jobs or permanently on the dole or ended up in trouble with the police or on drugs etc.
I went to a couple of school reunions in the past 10 years and I found this to certainly be the case. I can't speak for everyone but the majority of lads who were idiots and all full of themselves are still like that now albeit a few who settled down and grew up and turned out alright.
This is one of the things that used to drive me nuts about some people on Facebook. Why ask if you can be someone's friend and then never bother to speak to them? Friend collectors used to do my head in. I remember when I was on FB I used to have a purge of people every few months who wanted me to add them as a friend but then never bothered to say two words to me thereafter.
One person which I deleted who I never had anything to do with at school who never said a word to me on Facebook tried to add me again 3 times. What for? He had no intentions of actually speaking to me.
It's like asking someone for their phone number if you've got no intentions of calling them. What's the point?
I'm hardly a freind collector everybody on my FB I know in real life.
I'm not really sure that's always true, especially the more time that gets put between when you left school. I know I'm a completely different person to who I was when I left 15 odd years ago, but people don't really grow up during their early 20s that much.
Here's one from 2009, lol!
http://www.exeterexpressandecho.co.uk/Exeter-man-s-life-ruined-drugs/story-11829143-detail/story.html
And the same one a few years later:
http://www.thisiscornwall.co.uk/Armed-duo-threatened-neighbours/story-15558252-detail/story.html#axzz2sMR44uRW
I know loads of people which I don't actually speak to as friends. Like the woman who works in our local newsagent. Doesn't mean I would add them as a friend. You said so yourself that you haven't spoken to most of them and some not at all. So why bother adding someone you have no contact with? It's like asking someone for their phone number who you have no intentions of calling just so you can appear to have a few pretend "friends" in your contact list when in reality they're not friends at all, just people you once happened to know.
TBH I find the word 'Friends' seems to be used very loosely these days almost to describe anyone with which you've had the slightest contact with. It annoys me when I hear housemates on Big Brother talk about which other housemates they're friends with or they'll have an argument and say, 'I thought you were my friend'. You've only known one another 5 minutes. How can they be your friend?
Do you think ?
I was never bullied as such as I on day one identified who to keep well away from, so I avoided them and their little gangs like the plague over the three years I was there. Two boys I recall were Wayne Duforce and Kevin Frome who he who used to knock around with. All the boys I used to associate with kept away from them two and their little gang as well.
Both were a couple of p****'s who thought they were tough, with Duforce being suspended twice IIRC. Neither of them will have made anything of their life as both always used to be in the basic level classes, and they never did progress beyond that. I can vaguely mentally picture Duforce all dressed in grey and black, with a studded belt, and the two of them used to smoke and drink alcohol.
The ONLY time I EVER associated with Duforce was outside the changing rooms on a large grass patch, when all the boys were arm wrestling each other, and I was put with him. I was beating him when he suddenly chickened out.
As for where are they both now, I have no idea, and don't care what happened to them either. I wouldn't be surprised if Duforce did time or is dead and buried/burned. I suppose out of curiosity I could do a police record search, but as its a paid for service I'm not going to bother.
BTW there are a couple of videos of my old school on You Tube, still looks familiar in parts, and it hasn't changed that much.
The other one also has a good job in London and probably gets paid buckets, has a nice steady girlfriend and has done charitable works in Africa such as building a school. He has a photo of his arms around smiling African orphans as the cover photo on his facebook page that nearly made me vomit and was clearly put on there to show the world what a caring hero he is (or maybe that's just my cynical interpretation of it
Both of these people bullied me verbally and emotionally rather than physically and they were in the top sets at school so I wasn't expecting them to have turned into thugs who are in prison.
i was the original glasses wearing computer nerd.
anyhow ,,,,,,,, a few years ago , i heard through the grapevine that ian and his girlfriend had a pissed up row on their hotel room balcony in spain which resulted in ian going over it , plummeting to the ground ,,,,,,, apparently the accident has left him wheelchair bound for the rest of his life.
so my feelings ? ,,,,,,,,,,,,, well i honestly wouldn't wish that fate upon anyone ,,,,,,,,,, and i would still wish him all the best in life. despite the constant misery he put me through.
but if the gods/spirits/fate/circumstance/karma etc decree that these accidents must happen to folk , ,,,,, then i guess i would sooner hope it happens to bully's ,,,,,, than people who have never hurt nobody through life
ya know what i mean ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, i wish his tragic accident never happened ,,,,,,,,,, but like others have said ,,,,,, karma is a bitch